Z世代和千禧一代：我们为何如此孤独？

Gen Zs & Millennials: Why Are We So Lonely? | Talking Point | Full Episode 
Z世代和千禧一代：我们为何如此孤独？| Talking Point | 全集

 
Anyone anywhere will feel lonely at some point, but loneliness can be dangerous for those who feel it for extended periods of time. When you think of people most susceptible to being lonely, you might think of the elderly, or perhaps adolescents, but you would be wrong. A recent survey in Singapore highlighted that young adults need to be looked at too. In this hour-long episode of Talking Point, our team’s producer checks in on young adults across the island through a targeted campaign, and also looks inwards, on whether she herself is perhaps lonelier than she realises.
 
任何人在任何地方都会有感到孤独的时候，但对于那些长时间感到孤独的人来说，孤独是危险的。说到最容易感到孤独的人，你可能会想到老年人或者青少年，但你错了。最近在新加坡进行的一项调查强调，年轻人也需要关注。在这一小时的《谈话要点》节目中，我们团队的制片人通过一项有针对性的活动，对全岛的年轻人进行了调查，同时也对她自己是否比她意识到的更孤独进行了审视。
 
 
 
@ilosheher
i think being alone and lonely are two different things, and people are getting them mixed up (both in this video and the comments)
alone: people can enjoy being alone, and can be happy doing activities they like alone. solitude is a good thing, it helps us to know ourselves better.
loneliness: emotional manifestation; "sadness because one has no friends or company" (definition). loneliness is a feeling: when one feels sad or depressed due to a lack of social interaction. one may have thoughts such as "no one understands me", "i am not important to anyone", "i feel invisible", "i don't have anyone to share my real self with"
being lonely is not good for our health, these thoughts can really harm us if we don't express them and talk about this issue.
one can be alone WITHOUT feeling lonely
the same how one can be with a lot of friends and feel lonely
 
我认为独处和孤独是两码事，人们把它们混为一谈了（无论是在视频中还是评论里）。
 
独处：人们可以享受独处，可以快乐地独自从事自己喜欢的活动。
 
孤独是一种感觉：当一个人因为缺乏社交而感到悲伤或沮丧时，他可能会有这样的想法：“没有人理解我”、“我对任何人都不重要”、“我觉得自己是隐形的”、“我没有人与我分享真实的自己”。
孤独不利于我们的健康，如果我们不表达这些想法，不谈论这个问题，这些想法真的会伤害我们。
 
一个人可以独处而不感到孤独，就像一个人可以和很多朋友在一起却感到孤独一样。
 
 
 
@arkitotoyz
Exactly this. The experiment in their video got me confused. That is not what loneliness actually means. She is just doing random things alone but does not really show true loneliness. She only experienced mostly boredom as she has no phone or laptop to keep her entertained for 48 hrs.
 
正是如此。他们视频中的实验让我一头雾水。这不是孤独的真实含义，她只是一个人做了一些随意的事情，但并没有表现出真正的孤独。她只是体验到了大部分的无聊，因为她没有手机或笔记本电脑让她娱乐48小时。
 
 
 
@letsgoletsgoletsgoletsgoletsgo
you know hor , i've been thinking , as an introvert who really needs my alone time , i realise i find it hard to get along with people ( or more like people find it hard to get along with me ) , im quite opinionated , and sometimes i don't understand why people cannot accept strong opinions ..... i guess most people just like  very bland and surface interactions  ?
i guess people like us introverts really truly value honest  real interaction rather than  surface pleasantries ?
what do you think?
 
你知道吗，我一直在想，作为一个非常需要独处时间的内向者，我意识到我很难与人相处（或者更像是人们很难与我相处）。我很有主见，有时我不明白为什么人们不能接受强烈的意见 .....，我猜大多数人只是喜欢非常平淡和表面的互动？
我想像我们这样内向的人真的很看重真诚真实的互动而不是表面的寒暄？
你怎么看？
 
 
 
@alfredbittersweet
@letsgoletsgoletsgoletsgoletsgo  maybe because not just about what we say, it could be how we say?... could be lot reason like the tones of the words itself, or at times we could be bit over instructive... HMM
 
可能不仅仅是因为我们说什么，还可能是我们怎么说？......可能有很多原因，比如话语本身的语调，或者有时我们可能有点过于说教......嗯。
 
 
 
@devinj-np7dd
But also there are people who just can't connect with people anymore and just using the excuses of.. they lack socially with other people.. can't communicate well with others
 
也有些人就是无法与人沟通，只是用......他们缺乏与他人的社交......无法与他人很好地沟通......作为借口。
 
 
 
@ReviewMedic
if being alone without feeling lonely is not an issue then solitary confinement wouldn't be a punishment.....humans are social creatures.
 
如果独处而不感到孤独不是一个问题，那么单独监禁就不是一种惩罚.....，人类是社会性的动物。
 
 
 
@King-beyond-the-Line
I choose to live alone to improve my social life. We can be polite and behave ourselves at first. But the closer we get, the meaner we become. Nobody else lives in my house while people in neighborhood stay friendly. It is great.
 
我选择独居是为了改善我的社交生活。一开始，我们可以彬彬有礼，举止得体，但越是亲近，我们就越刻薄。我的房子里没有其他人，而邻居们都很友好。这很好。
 
 
 
@jjsamuelgunn1136
@letsgoletsgoletsgoletsgoletsgo   oh, i do think you are right. as well as the OP main comment. but that doesn't make the point of the video any less true. People may have many 'friends' with whom they share 'bland and surface interactions' especially on social media but they have very little 'honest real interactions'. that is the reason why they are lonely. some people are alone but not lonely because that is what makes them feel good, having zero interactions at all, irregardless of real or superficial. but some people are alone and lonely because they are unable to find very few, if any, friends or family with whom they share deep meaningful interactions. they may prefer to be cut themselves off and be alone rather than waste their time and energy on frivolous superficial interactions, but they do yearn for meaningful human connection which they can't find. i don't know if this is ironic in the age of social media or if social media is the very reason that people are unable form deeper connections. as an aside, this is maybe why scammers are so successful; because they tap into the vast pool of lonely people out there craving a deeper meaningful connection. my own take on why we face difficulty forming deeper friendships with other people is that because humanity have become more self-centred and even narcissistic. we are unwilling to compromise and accept others as they are. people that we meet must fit to all our standards of speech and behavior and our level of tolerance and willingness to compromise is lower. if anyone ticks us off or irritates/annoys us in the slightest, we write them off completely and shut them out or just interact with them on a superficial level.
 
哦，我觉得你说得没错。人们可能有很多“朋友”，他们与之进行“平淡而肤浅的互动”，尤其是在社交媒体上，但他们很少进行“真诚而真实的互动”。有些人之所以孤独寂寞，是因为他们找不到几个（如果有的话）朋友或家人与他们进行深层次的有意义的交流。他们可能宁愿与世隔绝，独来独往，也不愿把时间和精力浪费在琐碎肤浅的交流上，但他们确实渴望有意义的人际交往，而他们却找不到。我不知道这在社交媒体时代是否具有讽刺意味，或者社交媒体是否就是人们无法建立更深层次联系的根本原因。作为一个旁观者，这也许就是骗子如此成功的原因；因为他们利用了大量渴望建立更深层次联系的孤独人群。我个人认为我们之所以难以与他人建立更深层次的友谊，是因为人类变得更加以自我为中心，甚至自恋。我们不愿意妥协，也不愿意接受别人的本来面目。我们遇到的人必须符合我们所有的言行标准，而我们的容忍度和妥协意愿却越来越低。如果有人让我们不爽或让我们恼火，我们就会把他们彻底拒之门外，或者只是在肤浅的层面上与他们互动。
 
 
 
@Dremist
I am happy being an introvert.. being alone in solitude is awesome.
 
我很高兴自己是个内向的人...孤独地独处真是太棒了。
 
 
 
@Lobos222
It also indirectly makes you mentally stronger for the simple reason you are less likely to feel peer pressure in the same way.
Which kinda can make you unpopular among some people. Those other people I like to call,... losers! :D
 
它还能间接地让你的心理变得更强大，原因很简单，你不太容易感受到同伴的压力。
这有点会让你在某些人中不受欢迎，我喜欢把这些人称为......失败者！:D
 
 
 
@edwintan7096
Learn to be comfortable alone, you’ll learn a lot about yourself by being alone. The amount of peace you get, you’ll appreciate it a lot.
 
学会自在地独处，独处会让你更了解自己，你会非常珍惜独处给你带来的平静。
 
 
 
@InnerFire6213
During the height of covid i was told to isolate myself when i was infected, the whole week actually went like a breeze. I’m a healthcare worker so it was actually nice getting away from people and overworking for once. Best vacation ever
 
在新冠病毒最猖獗的时候，我被告知感染后要隔离自己，但实际上整个星期都过得非常轻松。我是一名医护人员，所以这一次远离人群和加班加点感觉真的很好。这是最棒的假期。
 
 
 
@me0wnicee
this whole documentary seems only relatable to extroverted people who cannot stand being alone for even a day, especially with the 48 hours experiment with the host. Wish the documentary dived deeper on the societal front rather than just giving advice that people inherently know like  reaching out / check in on your friends and family.
 
整部纪录片似乎只适合那些无法忍受一天独处的外向型人，尤其是主持人的48小时实验。希望这部纪录片能更深入地探讨社会方面的问题，而不仅仅是给出一些人们本来就知道的建议，比如走出去/与你的朋友和家人联系。
 
 
 
@Mysecondhandbookshop
Its better to be alone rather than wasting time with fake friends or superficial social interactions. I'm very careful of who i spend my time with, as i value my solitude alot. Having peace, less dramas and genuine friendships are priceless.
 
与其把时间浪费在虚假的朋友或肤浅的社交上，不如独处。我非常珍惜独处的时光，因此在选择交往对象时非常谨慎。平和的心态、较少的戏剧性和真诚的友谊是无价之宝。
 
 
 
@duskshadow25
I think a lot of introverts out there share the same concept that we get drained from socializing and meeting people at a party or some sort of group events. I personally prefer quality over quantity, so I never liked large events where there are a lot of people. Instead, I prefer just 1 on 1 quality time and conversation. Or, I don't mind hanging out with 2-3 close friends that we're all cool with each other. But anything more than that, it's going to be a hard pass for me.
You have to ask yourself how many friends do you have in your life that you can trust your life on. If you were to have a kid, can you trust your kid to that friend to look after your kid if something were to happen to you? If you were to hit rock bottom, how many friends do you have in your life that will help you get back on your feet? Most people will say they're your friends, but when it comes to push and shove, they're not going to go out of their way to be there for you. That's just the reality of life. And that's why I advocate for few homies you can trust for a life time vs. "friends."
 
我想很多内向的人都有同样的想法，那就是在派对或一些集体活动中，我们会因为社交和与人接触而感到精疲力竭。我个人更喜欢质量而不是数量，所以我从不喜欢人多的大型活动。相反，我更喜欢1对1的高质量时间和谈话。或者，我不介意和两三个关系不错的朋友一起出去玩。但如果超过这个范围，我就很难接受了。
 
你必须问问自己，在你的生活中，有多少朋友是你可以托付终身的。如果你有了孩子，你能把孩子托付给那个朋友，让他在你发生意外时照顾你的孩子吗？如果你跌入谷底，你生命中有多少朋友能帮你重新站起来？大多数人都会说他们是你的朋友，但到了紧要关头，他们却不会不遗余力地支持你，这就是生活的现实。这就是为什么我主张选择少数几个你可以托付终身的哥们而不是“朋友”。
 
 
 
@Lee-vo4by
Rather be alone than to be with people who keeps staring at their mobile phones at a table and not keen to spend time catching up with you.
 
我宁愿一个人，也不愿和那些在餐桌上一直盯着手机、不愿花时间和你聊天的人在一起。
 
 
 
@sleepy_dobe
I'm a Gen X, and I've been on my own for decades. I don't have many friends, and those that I have, I don't tend to meet them or have regular connection with them whether via online chats or talks over the phone. I'm unemployed, am recovering from a couple of mental disorders, so spend most of my time at home. I still hope to get married eventually but I'm so comfortable where I am that even when I match with someone on a dating app, I seldom overcome the inertia to go out and meet them. Rather, I spend my time at home reading and watching stuff online to keep upxed on current affairs, current tech, news, developments around the world, geopolitics, advancements etc, even trivial stuff. Basically just stuffing my brain with all kinds of knowledge, general as well as specific. I don't feel lonely. But am I cutting years off my lifespan? Or are Gen Xs immune to loneliness?
 
我是“X一代”，我独自生活了几十年。我的朋友不多，即使有，我也不太愿意和他们见面或与他们保持联系，无论是通过网上聊天还是电话聊天。我失业了，正在从几种精神疾病中恢复，所以大部分时间都待在家里。虽然我仍然希望最终能结婚，但我对现在的生活很满意，所以即使我在交友软件上找到了合适的人，我也很少克服惰性出去见他们。相反，我把时间都花在了在家阅读和上网看东西以了解最新的时事、最新的技术、新闻、世界各地的发展、地缘政治、进步等，甚至是琐碎的事情上。基本上，我的大脑里塞满了各种知识，既有一般性的，也有特殊性的，我并不感到孤独。我的寿命会因此缩短吗？还是X世代对孤独免疫？
 
 
 
@afihaileywibowo1095
We are immune to loneliness, or rather, embrace it. We won't even call lonely. We choose our friends and time and energy to spend with. The explosion of technology is like heaven of information popping open for me to discover thd world and expand my knowledge without draining energy that sometimes come by meeting people.
 
我们对孤独免疫，或者说我们拥抱孤独，我们甚至不会称之为孤独。我们选择朋友、时间和精力来相处。技术的爆炸式增长就像信息天堂突然被打开，让我可以发现世界，扩展知识，而不需要耗费精力去认识人。
 
 
 
@hilaryb8807
Yeah I'm GenX and couldn’t relate to “the experiment” at all. I think our generation was ignored and left alone by our parents, so we had to become independent and adaptable. The younger generations had helicopter parents, so they had constant attention and every minute was scheduled for them.
 
是的，我是X世代，我完全无法理解这个“实验”。我认为我们这一代人被父母忽视和冷落了，所以我们必须变得独立和适应性强。而年轻一代的父母都是“直升机父母”，所以他们时刻都受到关注，每一分钟都为他们安排好了。
 
 
 
@caramela4830
Idk. I'm a Millennial and didn't have helicopter parents at all. Mostly emotionally immature and emotionally absent parents. But, I grew up in a household with a Gen X sibling so I believe our baby boomer parents parented us in a similar manner.
 
我不知道。我是千禧一代，根本没有直升机父母。我的父母大多情感不成熟、情感缺失。但是，我和 X 世代的兄弟姐妹一起长大，所以我相信我们的婴儿潮一代父母对我们的教育方式是相似的。
 
 
 
@PaulineTheSupreme
Mmmhh…I’m a 30 years old female
I used to wonder if there was something wrong with me because honestly…there’s nothing I love more than peace and silence so I love being alone,however I have never felt lonely, I don’t really like inviting people over my house, doing or going to parties or anything like that that involves being with a lot of people, I even don’t really enjoy when strangers try to start conversations with me  and it’s not like I’ll be rude to them and ignore them or anything I’ll me awkwardly just there being like “hehe yeah…”  I literally only have 1 friend and we don’t really see each other that often but we text pretty much everyday
Idk there’s something so special  about being alone…
 
嗯......我是一个30岁的女性。
我曾经怀疑自己是不是有什么问题，因为老实说......没有什么比宁静和沉默更让我喜欢的了，所以我喜欢独处，但是我从来没有感到过孤独，我不太喜欢邀请别人来我家做客，也不太喜欢参加聚会或任何类似的需要和很多人在一起的活动，我甚至不太喜欢陌生人试图和我开始聊天，但我并不会对他们无礼，也不会不理他们或做任何事情，我只是尴尬地在那里说"嘿嘿......”我实际上只有一个朋友，虽然我们并不经常见面，但我们几乎每天都会发短信。
我不知道独处有什么特别之处......
 
 
 
@oksanafesenko3909
I see from this video that the remedy to loneliness is regular meaningful connection when you feel understood and accepted - not just being around people. I finally feel validated! But, it also explains why my mood gets low when I don't check in with my close people for several days. I feel like I'm close to finding that sweet balance I've been searching for...��
You are blessed to have found such a precious friend with whom you have regular meaningful connection
 
从这段视频中我看到，消除孤独的方法是定期进行有意义的交流，让你感到自己被理解和接受而不仅仅是与人相处。我终于感到自己被认可了！不过，这也解释了为什么我几天不和亲密的人联系就会情绪低落，我觉得我快要找到我一直在寻找的甜蜜平衡了...
你很幸运能找到这样一位与她经常保持有意义的联系的珍贵的朋友。
 
 
 
@Tgc1357
Being with ppl can be very stressful hence bad for health too ��
Better to be strong and independent and not expect anything from anyone.  
Spend quality time to know yourself well n enjoy life to the fullest.
 
与人相处可能会产生很大的压力，因此对健康也不好。
最好是坚强独立，不对任何人抱有期望。
花时间好好了解自己，充分享受生活。
 
 
 
@angmatthew
I rarely feel lonely. I still catch up with ex-colleagues, classmates, customers, friends, families, etc. When I pass by a specific place, maybe an ex-colleague or friend rings a bell, I will just give them a WhatsApp to see whether they are free for a coffee, etc. If I have no one to entertain me, I will visit temples do some chanting, go to the library to read a book, or catch a movie .
 
我很少感到孤独，我仍然会和以前的同事、同学、客户、朋友、家人等见面。当我路过一个特定的地方时，也许以前的同事或朋友会按响门铃，我会给他们发WhatsApp，看看他们是否有空喝咖啡等。如果没人招待我，我会去寺庙诵经、去图书馆看书或看电影。
 
 
 
@TomNook.
so you fix being lonely and being alone by not being alone. What great advice.
 
所以你可以通过不孤独来解决孤独和寂寞的问题，多好的建议啊。
 
 
 
@Almsoo7
I would say those who have not experienced loneliness will find it difficult to relate to that negative emotions. Being alone can be enjoyable at times but those who struggle with loneliness lie on the other spectrum and struggle to make others understand how and why they feel this way.
 
我想说，没有经历过孤独的人很难体会到这种负面情绪。独处有时也是一种享受，但那些与孤独作斗争的人却处于另一个极端，他们很难让别人理解他们是如何以及为什么会有这种感觉。
 
 
 
@tty8526
Being alone and loneliness are different thing. You can be surrounded by many people but feel lonely. But you can be alone and feel good
 
孤独和寂寞是两码事。你可以被很多人包围，却感到孤独，但你也可以一个人感觉很好。
 
 
 
@nownessy
please define more comprehensive about loneliness. Feeling lonely and loneliness are two different things.
As for me, I enjoy being with myself. In my solitude, I find more peace than being with others whom I don't or less know. I also have tendency to overshare to certain people (so far only one), but tend to over private to others. And I don't remember that I ever feel lonely for so many years now. In crowded rooms, I enjoy my solitudeness.
 
请对“孤独”下一个更全面的定义，感到孤独和寂寞是两码事。
就我而言，我喜欢和自己待在一起。在独处时，我觉得比和不认识或不太认识的人在一起更平静。我也有对某些人（目前只有一个）过度分享的倾向，但对其他人却倾向于过度保密。在我的记忆中，这么多年来我从未感到过孤独。在拥挤的房间里，我喜欢独处。