你怎么知道自己恋爱了(二)
How do you know if you''re in love?译文简介
网友:嗯,你知道的,你可能会从很多长期保持恋爱关系的人那里听到同样的答案。如果你还没有经历过恋爱的话,你会很难想象出(他们所说的到底是什么意思)。但他们都会笑着说“哦,你会知道的!”在某种程度上有些人是真的知道......
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How do you know if you're in love?
你怎么知道自己恋爱了?
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Hi Ravishankar. And thanks for the A2A.
Well, you know - you'll probably hear the same answer from many people who have been in a longer-term relationship. It's kind of difficult to imagine if you haven't experienced it yet. But they will all smile and say "Oh - you'll know!" It's true up to an extent. The problem can be that there may be cultural variations which complicate things. In the US, everyone makes such a big deal out of "dating". To a European (or maybe just to me), this whole dating thing is a bit of a puzzle. In Europe, things aren't so complicated. "Well, yeah, we hang out a lot together , but he's not by bf..."
But back to your question. If your brain melts when you see him or her. If your pulse goes all staccato, if you simply can't help grinning like a fool wherever they are near, if the way they smell makes you dizzy... chances are that you are in love. (Or a bit drunk, perhaps). If you like a guy or a girl fine, but don't feel like your head is going to fly up into the sky and explode like a big firework, then you like him / her, but you aren't in love.
Let me add something, if I may, in the hope that it will help you avoid grief in future: Being "in love" never lasts. Once the first three months are over at the latest, reality catches up with you. You will have had your first arguments. You will have seen one another with your early morning "oh my god, is it Monday already? I feel like I haven't slept a minute and I have a headache" face. You will start to miss the feeling of excitement when he or she is coming to visit. It'll become more everyday. this is when many people break up because they are disappointed. This is sad, because they are starting to see the real person behind the pretty, always happy and smiling mask of their new partner.
丹尼尔·施瓦兹·卡里吉特,我从来没有做过“约会”这种事。我喜欢直接。
嗨,拉维尚卡。谢谢你的提问。
嗯,你知道的,你可能会从很多长期保持恋爱关系的人那里听到同样的答案。如果你还没有经历过恋爱的话,你会很难想象出(他们所说的到底是什么意思)。但他们都会笑着说“哦,你会知道的!”在某种程度上有些人是真的知道。但问题可能是文化差异导致事情复杂化。在美国,每个人都把“约会”当成大事。对于一个欧洲人(或者仅仅对我来说),约会这件事有点让人困惑。在欧洲,事情并不那么复杂。“嗯,是的,我们经常一起出去玩,但他不是我的男朋友。”
回到你的问题上来。当你看到他或她时,如果你的大脑就像融化了一样、如果你的脉搏有点儿断断续续的,如果他们一靠近你就忍不住傻笑,如果他们的气味让你头晕。这就很有可能你恋爱了(或者有点醉了)。如果你喜欢一个男孩或女孩,但并不觉得你的头会飞向天空,像一个大烟花一样爆炸,那么你只是喜欢他/她,但你并没有恋爱。
如果可以的话,让我再补充一点,希望这句话能帮助你避免将来的悲伤:“恋爱”状态永远不会很持久。最迟等前三个月一过,你就会面对恋爱的感觉已经消失的现实。你们将发生你们之间的第一次争论。在清晨,你们看到彼此时会说:“哦,天哪,已经是星期一了吗?我觉得我昨天晚上一分钟都没睡,我还有点头痛。”当他或她来见你时,你会开始怀念以前那种兴奋的感觉。怀念以前日子的那种感觉每天都会变得越来越多。很多人因为失望而分手。他们开始看到新伴侣美丽、快乐、微笑的面具背后的真实的自己,这是很可悲的。
And this feeling - this feeling can also fade, but often lasts on and on. I have met old couples - over ninety, who hold hands and are simply happy to be together.
So there's hope for us all!
恋爱和爱一个人的最大区别是你不能爱一个你不真正了解的人。你知道,人们希望美丽感觉能够持续,但当它们消失时,他们会认为自己失败了、自己错了。他们开始去寻找那个对的人,而不是他们自己所认为的那个新伴侣。每一方都能看到对方的好和坏。爱来自于你对你伴侣的理解,随着时间的推移去了解这个人,就像了解你自己一样。并且想要和这个人在一起。作为一对夫妻比作为一个单身的人会更坚强。(你们)作为一个团队,彼此信任。就因为你们又在一起了,你们会感觉最糟糕的一天都变得更好了。尊重并真心喜欢你的伴侣,不要想着和去别人在一起。要知道什么能让他们笑,他们最喜欢的食物是什么,当他们情绪低落时你要如何做去让他们高兴。
这种感觉也会消退,但往往会持续很久。我曾遇到过90多岁的老夫妇,他们手牵着手,很高兴能和彼此一直在一起。
所以我们大家都要带着希望(去寻找另一半、去和另一半相处)!
How to Know If You’re In Love
“You’ll just know.” This was my mother’s vague response when I asked her how to know if you’re in love with someone, and needless to say, I was less than enthused by her response. To be honest, it seemed like a cop-out. Why, I wondered, can’t anyone seem to accurately describe what being in love feels like? We’ve all heard rom-com movie characters talk about fireworks and pop stars sing about the all-consuming obsession that comes with a new romance, but is that really love? Or is it just infatuation? How can you tell whether you're just experiencing fiery passion or you’ve truly fallen for someone?
As it turns out, there are ways to know you’re in love. And no, they have nothing to do with feeling butterflies in your stomach. In fact, research has revealed some common signs of being lovestruck. For example, people reported having new interests and personality traits after entering a loving relationship, according to one 1995 study. Another study revealed that falling in love can cause you to exhibit symptoms similar to those that come with anxiety, such as sweating more (woof, I know).
Of course, if you’re thinking and talking about the person nonstop, or you're already envisioning a future with them, you may suspect you’re in love. Still, those signals don’t always indicate that it’s the real thing. After all, in the beginning, your excitement around this new relationship could cloud your ability to see whether there’s real potential for a long-term relationship. The chemistry is great, you have endless topics to talk about, and you haven’t discovered all of their quirks, irritating habits or “flaws” yet. So it’s pretty easy to fool yourself into thinking you’ve fallen head over heels. Here are some of the things you feel when you’re in love:
如何知道你是否恋爱了?
“你会知道的。”这是我母亲含糊其辞的回答,当我问她如何知道你是否爱上一个人时,不用说,我对她的回答没有那么期待。老实说,这个回答好像是在逃避责任。我想知道的是,为什么没有人能准确地描述恋爱的感觉?我们都听过浪漫喜剧电影中的人物谈论烟花,流行歌手唱着对新恋情的痴迷,但这是真的爱情吗?还是说只是迷恋?你怎么知道你刚刚是经历了炽热的激情,还是说你真的爱上了某个人?
事实证明,有很多方法可以知道你恋爱了。不,它们和你感觉到心动没有关系。事实上,研究已经揭示了一些恋爱的常见迹象。例如,根据1995年的一项研究,人们在恋爱后有了新的兴趣和个性特征。另一项研究表明,坠入爱河会使你表现出与焦虑症相似的症状,比如出更多的汗(喔,我知道确实会这样)。
当然,如果你不停地想着和谈论某个人,或者你已经在憧憬着和他们的未来,你可能会怀疑你恋爱了。不过,这些信号并不总是表明这是真的在恋爱。毕竟,一开始,你对这段新恋情的兴奋可能会让你看不出这段感情是否有成为真正的长期恋情的潜力。(你们之间产生的)化学反应当然很好,你有无穷无尽的话题要和对方交谈,你还没有发现他们所有的怪癖、恼人的习惯或“缺点”。所以你很容易骗自己,以为自己已经深陷其中了。以下是你恋爱时会有的一些感受:
When you're in love, you're genuinely a happier person. The thought of spending time with your partner really excites you and just looking at the dozens of selfies you took together is enough to put a cheesy smile on your face. But being in love also makes you a tiny bit nervous. You're anxious for what the future holds. Because you know that you want your relationship to last. Lots of people compare love to something they could not lose or let pass them by, yet the uncertainty of its unknown outcome is exciting
2. Everything feels new and exciting.
When you're in love, you're excited to do things you've already done a million times before because it's with your partner this time. They're the first ones you think of when you see a romantic movie preview or when you're planning to make a quick trip to the nearest fast food place. You'd even be willing to sit through four hours of a sports game if it means spending time with them.. Maria says that's because love sparks a new change in you. "When you’re in love, the basis of your perception changes. I compare it to a feeling of being really awake and excited," she says. "You have found someone that makes everything feel new and intriguing – even if it’s just sitting on the couch watching TV.”
3. Your relationship feels easy.
Being with your partner isn't hard work. You don't have to struggle to find time to spend with them because you really want to. Even the arguments don't feel as intense as they did in other relationships. While all couples argue and bicker, when you're both in love, your priority is your relationship, not your pride. You're not worried about being the first person to give in or lose the argument because you can't imagine your life without this person. Even one day apart really feels like forever.
1.你很高兴,只是有点紧张。
当你坠入爱河时,你真的会变得更快乐。一想到与伴侣共度时光,你会很兴奋,只要看看你们一起拍的几十张自拍就足以让你脸上露出笑容。但恋爱也会让你有点紧张。你对未来充满了焦虑。因为你知道你希望你们的关系持续下去。“很多人把爱比作他们不能失去或放过的东西,然而其未知结果的不确定性确实令人兴奋。”玛丽亚这么说到。
2.每件事都让人感到新鲜和兴奋。
当你坠入爱河时,因为是和你的伴侣一起,所以你也会兴奋地去做一些你以前做过无数次的事情。当你看到一部浪漫电影的预告片或者打算去最近的快餐店吃饭时,你首先想到的就是对方。如果是和对方一起的话,你甚至愿意坐着看四个小时的体育比赛。玛丽亚说那是因为爱在你身上引发了一些新的变化。当你坠入爱河时,你感知的基础会改变。“我把它比作一种真正的清醒和兴奋的感觉,”她说你已经找到了一个能你感觉让一切都新鲜有趣的人——即使只是坐在沙发上看电视。”
3.你们的关系很轻松。
和你的伴侣在一起并不困难。因为你是真的想和他们待在一起,所以你不需要努力挤出时间去和他们在一起。即使是争吵也不像在其他关系中那样激烈。虽然所有的伴侣都会争吵,但当你们都相爱时,你们的首要任务是维护好你们的关系,而不是守住你们的骄傲。因为你无法想象没有这个人你的生活会是怎样,所以你不用担心自己会成为第一个屈服或输掉争论的人。即使是分开一天也感觉像是分开了很久很久。
When you're in love, your partner is always in the back of your mind. You might have a sudden thought to call them because you haven't chatted in a few hours. Or, maybe, you go into a clothing store with the intention of buying something for yourself and then end up buying something for your partner, too. "Love is determined. When you like someone, you can brush it off and think of other things as you go about your day," Maria says. When you're in love, this person is always on your mind, but it isn't overwhelming. "When you love someone, you are physically, mentally and emotionally impacted at theoretically any/all time(s). It is a calm and secure reality you will consistently crave," Maria says.
5. You get just a little jealous.
A little bit of jealousy is natural. Jealousy becomes dangerous, however, when you start obsessing over what your partner's doing, so much so that you do stuff like look through their phone without them knowing. That is toxic behavior and it might signal you're not in a healthy relationship.
6. You become more affectionate towards them.
When you're in love, you're obviously attracted to your partner, so it's only natural that you want to be all over them all the time. Whether it's simply holding hands or turning your cuddling into an intense make out session, you want to be affectionate towards your second half. If you're completely repulsed by them, that's something to think about.
7. You want to bring them around your family and friends.
When you're really into your relationship, you want to bring your partner into all aspects of your life. You want to introduce them to your family and friends because you genuinely want your relationship last.
4.这个人一直在你的脑海里。
当你坠入爱河时,你的伴侣总是会出现在你的脑海里。因为你们已经几个小时没有聊天了,所以你可能会突然想要打电话给他们。或者,当你走进一家服装店,打算给自己买点东西时,最后,你也会给你的伴侣买东西。“爱是坚定的。当你喜欢一个人的时候,你可以不去管他,而去想想其他的事情。(这样也不会影响你们两人之间的关系)”玛丽亚说。当你坠入爱河时,这个人总是会萦绕在你的心头,但并不会占满你全部的思绪。“当你爱一个人,理论上你会在任何时间都受到身体、精神和情感上的影响。这是一个你一直渴望的平静和充满安全感的现实。”玛丽亚说。
5.你会有点嫉妒。
一点点嫉妒是自然的。然而,嫉妒是危险的,当你开始沉迷于你的伴侣在做什么,以至于你做一些(出格的)事情,比如在对方不知道的情况下看他们的手机。这是一种不正确的行为,这可能意味着你们的关系不健康。
6.你对对方更加深情。
当你坠入爱河时,你显然会被你的伴侣所吸引,所以你想一直和对方在一起是很正常的。无论是简单的牵手,还是把拥抱变成紧张的亲热,你都想要另一半深情一点。如果你被他们完全拒绝了,那你就要好好想想(你们之间的关系)了。
7.你想把对方介绍给你的家人和朋友们。
当你真正投入到你们的关系中时,你会想把你的伴侣带入到你生活的方方面面。因为你真心希望你们的关系能够持续到最后,所以你会想把他们介绍给你的家人和朋友。
When you're in love, you start seeing your bae as an extension of yourself, so when they're hurt, nervous or really excited about something like getting accepted into a school or program they really wanted, then you experience the same feelings as them. Feeling empathy towards your partner also makes you want to make tiny sacrifices for them, like getting up and going to the store for some soup and medicine when they're sick. Small things like that are easy to do when they're for the person you love.
9. You’re becoming a better person.
You know you're in love when being with your second half makes you want to improve yourself in some way, whether it's setting new goals or having a more positive attitude. Your partner should push you towards becoming better, but not in a way that's consistently negative. "If a partner isn’t building you up, then you must consider looking elsewhere for love – no matter what other characteristics he or she may have that you are infatuated with," Maria says. When you're truly in love with someone, you want your partner to succeed as much as you because you want to create a stable future for the both of you.
10. You start planning for the future.
When you truly love someone, you know that you don't have plans to let them go any time soon, if ever. So, you start to include them in all your future plans, whether it's going on vacation or figuring out your plan after high school. You start thinking of your partner when you're making big decisions because you want them to be there for it all.
8.你开始对你的伴侣产生同理心。
当你坠入爱河时,你开始把你的爱人视为你自己的延伸,所以当他们受到伤害、紧张或对被他们真正想要的学校或项目录取感到兴奋时,你会体验到和他们一样的感受。对你的伴侣感同身受也会让你想为他们做出一些小小的牺牲,比如在他们生病的时候起床去商店买点汤和药。为你爱的人做这样的小事是很容易的。
9.你正在变得更好。
当你和另一半在一起的时候,你知道你在恋爱,这让你想在某种程度上提高自己,不管是设定新的目标还是采取更积极的态度。你的伴侣应该推动你变得更好,不能总是消极的。玛丽亚说,如果一个伴侣没有让你变得更好,那么你就必须考虑在别处寻找爱情了——不管你迷恋他或她到什么样的地步。当你真的爱上一个人时,你会希望你的伴侣和你一样成功,因为你想为你们俩创造一个稳定的未来。
10.你开始规划未来。
当你真正爱一个人的时候,你会知道,你不会打算在短时间内让他离开,甚至永远都不会。所以,你开始把他们纳入你未来的计划中,不管是去度假还是高中毕业后制定的计划。因为你希望他们一直在你身边,所以当你在做重大决定时,你会考虑到你的伴侣。
Well as the question is asked without mentioning any specific gender (male or a female), so I would try to put forward few of my views/opinion about both of them.
If a girl loves a boy:
Love is a very beautiful yet a very weird emotion. When a woman is in love with a man, no matter how mature, sensible or in control of her life she is, one will be able to always observe a few differences or changes in her personality which would indicate that she is madly and deeply in love with a guy/man.
Usually shy behaviour: It is quite a common feeling to have those butterflies fluttering around in your stomach when you are around the one you love. Women, being the more sensitive ones, tend to handle such a sensation differently. When a woman is around a man that she is deeply in love with, people around her start to notice a few changes in her. Those changes in her mainly highlight the enhanced feminine qualities of the woman. People would observe that the woman starts to get shy over small things, such as communicating directly with the one she loves, hesitating to make direct eye contact, rigid body postures and so forth.
Giving her man a present: The exchange of presents is considered as a gesture of love and care If a woman is in love with a man, she would buy presents for him without any reason. Usually, we buy presents for our loved ones on their birthdays or anniversaries, but in this case the woman would buy gifts without any proper reason. It is a really good indication of her love for that man. But on the contrary, few girls also likes to give presents to their friends too, so it's your duty to distinguish between that thin line to understand if you are the guy that she in love with or the “just friend”.
Acting childish infront of the man she loves: A woman may start to behave childish around the man she loves because she would believe that she can be cute around him. Childish behavior mostly indicates cuteness. She will try to woe him by her innocent actions and words, but know that her intentions are highly pure and acting innocent just shows a glimpse of her deeper feelings for you, isn't it!
因为这个问题没有提到任何具体的性别(男性或女性),所以我会尝试提出一些我对这两个方面的看法/意见。
如果一个女孩爱一个男孩:
爱是一种非常美丽却又非常怪异的情感。当一个女人爱上一个男人时,无论她多么成熟,多么理智,多么能掌控自己的生活,人们总能观察到她性格上的一些差异或变化,这表明她疯狂地深深地爱上了一个男人。
通常害羞的行为:当你和你爱的人在一起时,心痒痒的那种感觉很常见。女性,作为更敏感的人,倾向于以不同的方式去处理这种感觉。当一个女人和她深爱的男人在一起时,她周围的人会开始注意到她身上的一些变化。她身上的这些变化主要突出了她的女性气质。.
人们会注意到,女人开始在小事情上变得害羞,比如直接与她爱的人交流,犹豫是否要进行直接的眼神交流,僵硬的身体姿势等等。
给男人礼物:如果一个女人爱上一个男人,她会毫无理由地给他买礼物。通常,我们会在亲人的生日或周年纪念日给他们买礼物,但如果一个女人爱上一个男人,她会在没有任何正当理由的情况下买礼物。这很好地表明了她对那个男人的爱。但相反的是,少数女孩也喜欢送礼物给她们的朋友,所以你要区分好你是她深爱着的男人还是“只是朋友”。
在她爱的男人面前表现得孩子气:一个女人在她爱的男人面前可能会表现得孩子气,因为她相信在他身边她会很可爱。孩子气的行为大多表示可爱。她会试图用自己无辜的言行来折磨他,但她知道自己的意图是非常纯洁的,她所表现出的无辜只是她对你更深的感情的一个侧面,不是吗!
Tries to impress the man physically: She would try to enhance her good features so that the man would notice them and like her. It is all but natural for a woman to want to make the man like her if she is in love with him. She would not necessarily dress up too much to make him notice her, but just enough so. Looking good for the one they love also gives them a higher sense of purpose, something that would make the one they love notice them more than before. And can we blame them? Love makes us do crazy things after all, doesn’t it?
Gets shy when maintaining an eye contact: They say only two kinds of people are unable to make eye contact with you: those trying to hide a lie and those trying to hide a love. For women, the latter case seems to be the more common one. If a woman is in love with a man then while maintaining an eye contact with that man the man would notice that she would get shy or try to look away.
Pays a lot of attention to the needs and wants of the man: If a woman is deeply in love with a man, then she would pay a lot of attention to all his needs and she would make sure that he gets what he wants. She would try her best to please him in every possible manner. One can sort of relate it to the care that a mother would give to her child, because she wants to keep the child happy and pleased. Same goes for a woman who is deeply in love.
主动谈话:女人大多不喜欢成为一个主动搭话的人,尽管谈论的不是什么私人的话题。有些男人没有意识到,当一个女人和他多次交谈时,无论是在手机上还是在现实生活中,都意味着她对他感兴趣,而且很可能爱上了他。当然,这个迹象并不能证明女人是单独爱上男人的,但事实上,不同迹象的组合证明了(他们之间存在)爱情。因此,如果还有其他迹象的话,就可能是一个非常强烈的(她爱上了你的)迹象。所以每个男人都应该知道,一个女人开始交谈需要很大的勇气,如果一个女人这样做了,那么他们应该承认并且欣赏她。最终这是她爱上你的标志!
试着在身体上给男人留下深刻印象:她会试着增强自己的好容貌,这样男人就会注意到并喜欢她。如果一个女人爱上了一个男人,她想让他喜欢她是很自然的。她不一定多会打扮,让他注意到她,但也就足够了。为她们所爱的人而打扮也给了她们更高的目标感,这会让她们所爱的人比以前更加注意到她们。但我们能怪她们吗?爱情终究会让我们做一些疯狂的事,不是吗?
保持眼神交流时会害羞:他们说只有两种人无法与你进行眼神交流:一种是试图隐藏谎言的人,另一种是试图隐藏爱情的人。对于女性来说,后一种情况似乎更为常见。如果一个女人爱上了一个男人,那么在和那个男人保持眼神交流的同时,这个男人会注意到她会变得害羞或者试图把目光移开。
关注男人的需要和欲望:如果一个女人深深地爱上了一个男人,那么她会非常关注他所有的需要,她会确保他得到他想要的。她会尽可能地去取悦他。我们可以把这个情况和母亲对孩子的照顾联系起来,母亲想让孩子快乐。一个深陷爱河的女人也是如此。
The way he looks at you: He looks at you like you are an unicorn, like he can’t believe you exist. He may even come right out and tell you, “I can’t believe someone like you exists.” It isn’t a look of lust and desire. Instead, it’s marked by a certain awe, serenity, and inner calm. It’s a look reserved only for you. It’s not only the way he looks at you; it’s the frequency. He can’t stop looking at you; whether you’re together or across the room from each other, his gaze will always be oriented towards you.
He always wants to give you: When you love someone, you want to give that person everything you have. This isn’t about material possessions. You want to give by being the best you can, you want to make them happy, to enhance their life, you want to do things for them that will make them happy. And this act of giving can be anything even, time, respect, care, love, gifts, kindness and everything that truly matters when two people are in love with each other or atleast the one who is in love with someone.
He gives you a priority: Everyone is busy; we all have work or studies or other commitments. When a man loves you, he will make spending time with you a priority. And if he really doesn’t have time, he’ll make sure to let you know when he will be free.
He really sees you: He notices things about you that others don’t (maybe he even sees things that you don’t!) He notices how you interact with others, how people feel in your presence, how your mind works, how you process emotions, how you express yourself. He pays attention to all the little details and he remembers them. He appreciates both the sides of you, the good and the bad as well.
如果一个男孩爱一个女孩:
他看你的方式:他看你就像你是一只独角兽,就像他不相信你的存在。他甚至会直接出来告诉你:“我真不敢相信有像你这样的人存在。”这不是一种欲望和渴望得到你的表情。相反,它的特点是某种敬畏、宁静和内心的平静。这是只为你保留的表情。这不仅仅在于他看你的方式;而在于他看你的频率。他不停地看着你;无论你们在一起还是隔着房间,他的目光都会一直盯着你。
他总是想给你:当你爱一个人的时候,你想给那个人你所拥有的一切。这与物质财富无关。你想尽你所能去奉献,你想让他们快乐,去改善他们的生活,你想为他们做一些让他们快乐的事情。这种奉献行为可以是任何东西,甚至是时间、尊重、关心、爱、礼物、善良,以及当两个人相爱或至少是爱上一个人时最重要的一切东西。
他会给你一个优先权:每个人都很忙;我们都有工作或学习或其他约定。当一个男人爱你时,他会优先考虑和你在一起。如果他真的没有时间,他一定会告诉你他什么时候有空。
他能够了解你真实的想法:他能注意到别人看不到的关于你的事情(也许他甚至看到了你看不到的事情!)他注意到你如何与他人互动,人们在你面前的感受,你的思维如何运作,你如何处理情绪,你如何表达自己。他会注意所有的小细节,并且记住它们。他欣赏你的每一面,不管是好的一面还是坏的一面。
He misses you: Men typically fall in love in a woman’s absence, not her presence. A man can shower you with all the love in the world while he’s with you,but what is he like when he’s not with you? Does he miss you? Does he make an effort to reach out? Or does he disappear for days on end and then tell you he’s sorry, he’s just been “super swamped?” well, figure it out!
You don't worry how he feels, you just know: When someone truly loves you, his behavior and way of being with you won’t arouse feelings of insecurity/fear/anxiety/worry in you (as long as you yourself are emotionally healthy. If you’re prone to having those feelings no matter what, then they are probably generated within you). Check in with yourself and see where it’s coming from. Usually, when we feel uneasy, like the rug is going to be pulled out from under us, it’s because the relationship isn’t standing on a stable ground because the guy isn’t sure of how he feels. When someone loves you, he shows it and you just know it, even before he says it.
So basically, if a person is in love with you, then it's all about the actions that we can see from that other person and undoubtedly we can get to know what this is all about!
你的幸福对他也很重要:你的幸福可能更重要!当你真的爱一个人时,他们的幸福就是你的幸福。这对于那些需要让女人感到快乐的男人来说尤其如此。如果你告诉他有些事情让你不开心,但他一直那样做,这并不是他爱上你的迹象。一个爱你的男人会避免做让你不开心的事情,他会去学习那些让你开心的事情。
他会想你:男人通常在女人不在的时候爱上她,而不是在她在场的时候。一个男人和你在一起的时候可以给你世界上所有的爱,但是当他不在你身边的时候,他是什么样的人呢?他想你吗?他会努力向你伸出援手吗?或者他连续消失了好几天,然后他很抱歉的告诉你,他只是“非常忙”?好吧,这需要你自己去想想办法。
你不必担心他的感受,你只需要知道:当一个人真正爱你时,他的行为和与你在一起的方式不会引起你内心的不安全感/恐惧/焦虑/担忧(只要你自己的情绪健康)。如果你倾向于不管发生什么都有这些感觉,那么它们很可能是你自己产生的。问问你自己,看看它是从哪里来的。通常,当我们感到不安时,就像地毯要从我们身下被抽走一样,那是因为这段关系没有建立在一个稳定的基础上,因为这家伙不确定自己的感受。当爱你的时候,他会表现出来,你就知道(他是爱你的)了,甚至在他说出来之前(你就知道了)。
所以基本上,如果一个人爱上了你,那么这一切都是我们可以从对方身上看到的行为,毫无疑问,我们可以(通过这些行为)知道这是怎么回事!