如何避免老大徒伤悲？

Sean Kernan
When Jeff Bezos was 30, he was facing a career crossroads.
He was a high performer at his finance firm and about to enter middle management. It would be a long, treacherous, mostly-predictable march toward leadership.
But he’d already made up his mind. He went to his boss and said he was quitting to launch an online book store. It sounded ridiculous at the time.
His boss said, “Jeff, I would normally say go for it — if you didn’t already have a good job.”
He imagined himself at 80.
He asked himself, “Would the 80-year-old me regret not launching Amazon?”
And it became an obvious choice.
We’re supposed to take leaps of faith in life. I did it with writing. Fortunately, it worked out — but I fell face-first so many times with other endeavors.
I suppose it was my turn for one of these risks to pay off.
You are more capable of success than you think. Have the courage to fail. Know the payoff is that you won’t despair having never tried.

杰夫·贝佐斯30岁时，正面临职业生涯的十字路口。
他在金融公司表现出色，即将进入中层管理层。这将是一场漫长、诡谲、几乎可以预见的领导之路。
但他已经下定决心了。他去找老板，说他要辞职去开一家网上书店。当时这听起来很可笑。
他的老板说：“杰夫，我通常会说去争取吧——如果你还没有找到一份好工作的话。”
他想象自己80岁。
他问自己，“80岁的我会后悔没有创办亚马逊？”
这成为一个显而易见的选择。
我们应该对生活充满信心，我是通过写作做到的。幸运的是，这成功了 — 但我在其他（领域）努力了很多次，也失败了很多次。
我想该轮到我来承担这些风险了。
你比你想象的更有能力获得成功。要不惧失败。你要知道，只要做了，就不会后悔。

TA Sullivan
Embrace where they are in their lives; what they have in their lives; and who they have in their lives. If they start (or continue) to compare themselves with others or their lives with others, they’ll always be regretful or seeking.
Love yourself and what you’ve done, and understand that life is beautiful.

拥抱生活；生活中的一切；以及生活中的人。如果他们开始（或继续）将自己与他人进行比较，或将自己的生活与他人进行对比，他们将永远后悔，求索不得。
爱你自己和你所做的一切，意识到生活是美好的。

Old Gal
Architect/Design at I Am Not Saying (1989–present)Jan 20
Treat people like you want to be treated.
Case point: My mom has developed dementia recently. Now its time for me to take care of her.
I am still wondering how I am going to accomplish this, being that most of my childhood, I was beat, humiliated and accused of stuff I did not do. Molested by my uncle but that was stuff that was shameful and we just did not talk about stuff back then… I guess back then it was better to shove your head so far in the sand that shit was just supposed to go away.. Well it did not.
Had she been a better parent or a better person in her younger days, we would not have this problem. She would have had a daughter to help her willingly, she would have friends who would help her, but they all avoid her like the plague.
Yea.. I guess people do things they all regret but if you treat others like you want to be treated.. when you are younger, then you will have some support when you get older.

推己及人。
案例要点：我妈妈最近患上了痴呆症。 现在是我照顾她的时候了。
我仍然想知道我该怎么做，因为在我童年的大部分时间里，我被殴打、羞辱和因为我没有做过的事情而受到指责。 被我叔叔猥亵，但那是令人羞耻的事情，我们当时根本不谈论这些事情……我想那时候最好把头埋在沙子里，这样这些烂事就应该消失了……好吧，并没有。
如果她年轻时是一个更好的父母或更好的人，我们就不会有这个问题。 她会有一个心甘情愿帮助她的女儿，她会有愿意帮助她的朋友，但他们现在都像躲避瘟疫一样躲着她。
是的..我想人们都会做让他们后悔的事情，但如果当你年轻时像对待自己一样对待别人，那么当你变老时你会得到一些支持。

Richard Givens
Follow your heart when you’re young.
When I was in college I missed the Army and thought about going back in… That little voice in the back of my head was actually screaming at me, but I didn’t listen. And then another time I dreamed about taking some time off and getting a job in a bar on a beach somewhere.. Florida maybe. But I didn’t.
I was miserable in college.. broke all the time, piece of shit car that I could barely keep running, heavy course load, etc. But I thought I was “supposed to” stay and finish. And I did… But now that I’m in middle age and nearing retirement, I’ll always wonder “what if.”
Same thing applies to relationships.. If you’re seeing red flags in a person, then LISTEN to them!
Don’t ignore them.. Follow your heart.

年轻时请随心而动。
当我上大学的时候，我想的是参军，想回到过去…我脑后的那个小声音实际上在向我尖叫，但我没有听。还有一次，我梦想着休息一段时间，在海滩上的酒吧找份工作。也许是在佛罗里达州。但我没有。
我在大学时很痛苦。一直都很糟糕，一辆我几乎跑不动的狗屎车，沉重的课程负荷等等。但我认为我“应该”留下来完成比赛。我做到了…但现在我已经步入中年，即将退休，我总会想“如果（我不这么做）…”
同样的事情也适用于感情关系…如果你在一个人身上看到了危险信号，那就听他们说！
不要忽视它们…请跟随你的心。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

Steven Ussery
It amounts to this. Just don’t do that to yourself! However, people keep endlessly asking about that whole regret thing on this forum. I am not sure why? It must be some kind of point of fascination or something? Anyway, my answer hasn't changed. You may differ from my opinion, but I think my answer is the only correct answer.
I am 69 years old. Even so, I don’t do regrets anymore. Those are for people who like to spend their life looking backwards at where they been instead of looking forward to the better things that are likely to come. Why should someone care about the past when there’s absolutely nothing you can do to change it? Let it go, and get on with your life.

现在这么做就会让你后悔！千万别问自己这个问题。然而，人们在这个论坛上不断地问起令人后悔的事情。我不知道为什么？这一定有某种吸引人的地方吗？无论如何，我的答案没有改变。你可能与我的观点不同，但我认为我的答案是唯一正确的答案。
我今年69岁。即使如此，我也不再后悔了。那些人喜欢用一生的时间回顾过去，而不是期待未来的美好。当你无法改变过去时，为什么有人要关心过去？放手吧，继续你的生活。

At age 69, I spend my time in the moment or looking at my hopes for the future. Why shouldn’t I? I have seldom been disappointed when I did.
The ancient Roman statesman and philosopher Lucius Seneca had a saying: “Always look forward, never backwards.” I’ve alway found that to be damn good advice. No one can or will change the past for you — not even God. Learn from your mistakes and misfortunes and leave them behind you where they belong.
C’est la vie.

69岁时，我把时间花在当下，或是展望未来。为什么不呢？ 当我这样做时，我很少感到失望。
古罗马政治家和哲学家吕齐乌斯·塞涅卡说过一句话：“永远向前看，永远不要回头。”我一直认为这是一个非常好的建议。没有人能够或者可以为你改变过去，甚至上帝也不会。从你的错误和不幸中吸取教训，然后把它们留在身后。
这就是生活。

Jules Kitchener
Try to forget it you can’t change the past after all.

得了吧，毕竟你不能改变过去。

Aide
1.forgive
2.follow your heart
3.-uck it

1、学会原谅
2、随心而动
3、去他的
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

Judy T
Live the life you’re given.
As you go through the seasons of life, do what is necessary to move forward. If you need to repent and ask for forgiveness, do that. If you need to accept what has happened and live in peace, do that. If you need to make changes in your life, do that.
Regret in itself is not a bad thing, but living with regret leaves you stuck in the past.

过你被赋予的生活。 当你经历人生的各个季节时，做一些必要的事情来向前迈进。 如果你需要忏悔并请求宽恕，那就去做吧；如果你需要接受已经发生的事情并平静地生活，那就去做吧；如果你需要改变你的生活，那就去做吧。后悔本身并不是坏事，但带着遗憾生活会让你陷入过去。

Mary Sunshine Price
The things I regret most are the things I never tried. Of course, there are skills I have now that I lacked in my youth, and I did many things that were cringe-worthy, but I learned from my mistakes, so I probably wouldn't change anything. Just don't allow fear to run your life.

我最后悔的事情是我从未尝试过的事情。当然，我现在的一些技能是我年轻时所缺乏的，我畏手畏脚地做了很多的事情。但我从错误中吸取了教训，所以我可能不想改变任何（已经发生的）事情。只是，不要让恐惧主宰你的生活。