我如何在美国获得成功（二）
How do I get success in the USA?
译文简介
网友：你首先需要定义什么是成功。是有一份中产阶级的工作，住在郊区，一个家庭有2个孩子?还是成为一个拥有一堆超级跑车的千万富翁?如果你的梦想是谦逊的，那么它真的可以归结为学习一项你喜欢或不讨厌的、薪水体面的就业技能，之后就是量入为出了。
正文翻译
How do I get success in the USA?
我如何在美国获得成功?
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You need to first define what success is. Is it having a middle class job, living in the suburbs with a family unit that has 2 children? Or is it being a multi-millionaire who owns a bunch of super cars?
If your dreams are modest then it really comes down to learning an employable skill that pays decent and you either like or just don’t hate. After that it’s living within your means.
你首先需要定义什么是成功。是有一份中产阶级的工作，住在郊区，一个家庭有2个孩子?还是成为一个拥有一堆超级跑车的千万富翁?
如果你的梦想是谦逊的，那么它真的可以归结为学习一项你喜欢或不讨厌的、薪水体面的就业技能，之后就是量入为出了。
Why is it so hard to succeed in the USA?
I immigrated to the USA 5 years ago and people are extremely hurt and hurtful and despite all the peace and liberty talk, it feels like I’m stuck in a cycle of slavery that’s ran by capitalism. No matter if you are so smart or educated, or try so hard, they won’t let you be a thing if they don’t want to and their stupid laws only make poor people more miserable. there is extreme discrimination. I say that because of all the opportunities I’ve been denied due to my name! America Sucks! even the third world countries have a higher happiness rate. In America life is about repression. all you need to do is to not be yourself, suck it all in and shut up and go with the flow until you die. I’m thinking of a way out!
为什么在美国成功如此困难？
我5年前移民到美国！人们受到了极大的伤害，尽管有和平与自由的言论，但我感觉自己陷入了资本主义的奴役循环。无论你是如此聪明、受过教育，还是非常努力，如果他们不愿意，他们都不会让你成为一个人物，他们愚蠢的法律只会让穷人更加痛苦。存在极端歧视。我这么说是因为我的名字让我失去了所有的机会！美国糟透了！即使是第三世界国家也有较高的幸福率。在美国，生活给你的感觉就是压抑。你所需要做的就是不要做你自己，接受这一切，闭上嘴，随波逐流，直到你死去。我在想办法出去!
How do some immigrants to the US become so successful after moving here?
Immigrants are exceptional by sextion. Like most countries, we prefer immigrants that improve our population.
First, the U.S. has a process in place such that they choose who gets in, preferring high education, rare talent/abilities, and/or money/investment. Then legal immigrants have to make a strong effort to immigrate: it’s anything but an easy process. So lazy or stupid people are (hopefully) not admitted in the first place. (Ignoring the hypocrisy on illegals, of course, but that’s another issue entirely.)
Immigrants self-sext and are motivated, partly because it takes a lot to get to the U.S. at all. They see the U.S. as a land of opportunity and are determined to make the most of it. Then they work really hard, take advantage of educational opportunities, and all the other opportunities.
Most Americans only know the U.S. and don’t realize/appreciate the opportunities they have compared to most everyone else. Even the second generation: most of the 2nd gen kids I grew up with hated me because I worked like a 1st gen and their parents compared them to me.
一些移民到美国后是如何变得非常成功的？
移民是特殊的选择。像大多数国家一样，我们更喜欢能改善我们人口的移民。
首先，美国有一个程序，让他们选择谁移民进来，更喜欢高等教育、稀有人才/能力和/或金钱/投资。然后，合法移民必须就必须做出巨大努力：这绝对不是一个简单的过程。因此，懒惰或愚蠢的人（希望）首先不会被承认。（当然，忽略非法移民的虚伪，但这完全是另一个问题。）
移民是自我选择的，他们的动机是积极的，部分原因是他们需要付出很多才能到达美国。他们将美国视为一块充满机遇的土地，并决心充分利用它。然后他们真的很努力，利用教育机会和所有其他机会。
大多数美国人只了解美国，与其他大多数人相比，他们没有意识到/珍惜自己拥有的机会。甚至是第二代:大多数和我一起长大的第二代孩子都讨厌我，因为我像第一代一样工作，以至于他们的父母会拿他们和我比较。
A large portion of the American population, maybe the majority, is remarkably accepting of immigrants, especially when they’re not racist. That’s because most of us are descendants of recent immigrants. In other countries where they’re legally accepting of immigrants, they’re not necessarily socially accepting, which cuts off a lot of the business deals that might have happened otherwise.
This wasn’t always the case, by any means. The relative ease of recent Asian immigration was paved by Southern and Eastern European immigrants. And Japanese Americans being put in concentration camps during WWII. Germany went/is going through similar growing pains with their Turkish population.
[rewrite] The U.S. doesn’t put up huge blockers for foreigners to succeed once they are here, unlike many other countries. Foreigners are allowed to own the entirety of relatively small properties and businesses, unlike some other developed countries. Generally no extra paperwork required.
It’s not easy to immigrate (in English, the definition is a permanent move), but once they’re permanent residents, it’s pretty close to the same rights as citizens, including firearms ownership. Once they’re citizens, they have the same rights as natural-borns, except becoming President and probably a few others.
正如格雷格·凯姆尼茨（Greg Kemnitz）在评论中提到的那样，美国的教育机会非常灵活。我不知道其他国家不同的教育系统，但在外国出生的成年人可以去社区/专科大学或4年的本科课程，甚至在获得居留权之前。我们的研究生院有很多外国人，特别是在理工科领域。
大部分美国人口，可能是大多数人，明显接受移民，尤其是当他们不是种族主义者时。那是因为我们大多数人都是新移民的后代。在其他国家，他们在法律上接受移民，但他们社会不一定接受移民，这就切断了许多原本可能发生的商业交易。
无论如何，情况并非总是如此。最近亚洲移民的相对宽松是由南欧和东欧移民推动的。二战期间日裔美国人被关进集中营。德国的土耳其人口也经历过类似的成长痛苦。
与许多其他国家不同，美国没有为外国人在美国成功设置巨大的障碍。与其他一些发达国家不同，外国人被允许拥有全部相对较小的房地产和企业。通常不需要额外的凭证手续。
移民并不容易（在英语中，定义为永久移民），但一旦他们成为永久居民，就相当接近于公民的同等权利，包括枪支所有权。一旦他们成为公民，除了无法成为总统和从事其他一岗位，他们就拥有与自然出生的人相同的权利。
Is going to the US equivalent to becoming successful?
At one stage I was looking at moving to the US - even got an interview with Amazon. How successful would that be?
Then I started listing the pros & cons, and realised that without healthcare, life could be a problem. A big problem.
I decided to not pursue my potential career in the US. It might look like success, but it's too risky knowing that what is touted as “the best healthcare in the world” is no good if you can't afford to use it.
去美国等于成功吗？
有一段时间，我打算搬到美国，甚至还接受了亚马逊的采访。这会有多成功？
然后我开始列举利弊，并意识到没有医疗保健，生活可能会成为一个大问题。
我决定不去美国追求我潜在的职业。这看起来可能是成功的，但知道如果你负担不起，被吹捧为“世界上最好的医疗保健”对你而言就不太好，这就太冒险了。
A friend of mine has huge feet - sized UK 13.
A few years ago I was strolling through a high-end departmental store in Malaysia with him.
He saw a shoe he liked, asked for it in his size, tried it on, went to the cashier to pay with his credit card.
The odd thing was that the price wasn't written on the shoe, he hadn't asked the price, and he wasn't particularly wealthy - he was in the early stages of a startup.
I asked him, "Why didn't you even ask for the price of the shoe before buying?"
He explained, "Asim, the shoes could cost anything from US$200 to $1k, I liked them, and my shoe size is pretty difficult to find in Malaysia. If I spend 2 hours finding a shoe at the lowest end of that scale I'd save up to $800 but my 2 hours is worth way more than that to me."
The shoes ended up costing around $300.
This guy is now worth more than $10m.
Tip. Value your time.
我的一个朋友有一双大脚—英码13号。
几年前，我和他在马来西亚的一家高端百货商店闲逛。
他看到一只他喜欢的鞋，要了一双他穿的尺码，试了试，然后去收银台用信用卡付款。
奇怪的是，鞋子上没有写价格，他也没有问价格，他也不是特别富有—他正处于创业的早期阶段。
我问他：“你为什么在买之前都不问问鞋的价格呢？”
他解释道：“Asim，这双鞋的价格从200美元到1000美元不等，我很喜欢，而且我的鞋码在马来西亚很难找到。如果我花2个小时找到一双最低价的鞋，我是可以省下800美元，但对我来说2个小时比这更值钱。”
这双鞋最终花了大约300美元。
这家伙现在身价超过1000万美元。
提示：珍惜你的时间。
For the most part, companies are succeeding in spite of government, not because of it.
Keep things in context; there's a difference between a grant and a tax incentive. A grant is when the government gives you money. A tax break is when you keep more of your own money instead of giving it to Uncle Sam.
Isn't it odd how whenever the government isn't robbing businesses via the tax code they flourish, create millions of jobs, and ultimately generate more prosperity (and tax revenue) than when the government taxes them out of the gate? You'd think people would have figured this out by now and quit calling for tax increases on businesses...
Government picking winners and losers harms more than it helps. All evidence suggests the more they stay out of the way, the better off we are.
在很大程度上，公司的成功与政府无关，也不是因为政府。
将事情置于语境中;补助金和税收激励是有区别的。补助金是政府给你钱。减税是指你保留更多的属于自己的钱，而不是把钱交给山姆大叔。
每当政府不通过税法抢劫企业时，企业就会蓬勃发展，创造数百万个就业机会，最终产生比政府对企业征税时更多的繁荣（和税收），这难道不奇怪吗？你可能认为人们现在已经明白了这一点，不再呼吁对企业增税了。
政府挑选赢家和输家弊大于利。所有的证据都表明，他们越是置身事外，我们的境况就越好。
What does a USA immigrant need to do in order to be successful?
You need a sense of self-reliance and you need to spend time figuring out how things work in the places you find yourself.
If you are coming from a background where you’ve had things provided for you or expect things to get done for you because of who you are or what you know, prepare for a big cultural adjustment. The USA (and Canada and Britain…) will not hold your hand or give you want you want just because you’re used to it. You’re going to be expected to show up and stand in line like everyone else and follow the same process.
Get used to that now. It will make your transition easier. From getting a driver’s license to opening a bank account to renting/buying a place to live to getting utilities or getting food. You’re going to be expected to handle it on your own and follow the same rules as everyone else.
美国的移民需要做什么才能成功？
你需要一种自力更生的意识，你需要花时间弄清楚在你的地方事情是如何运作的。
如果你来自一个背景：因为你是谁或你知道什么，你已经有了为你提供的东西，或者期待着为你做一些事情，那么为一次大的文化调整做好准备。美国（以及加拿大和英国…）不会仅仅因为你习惯了就牵着你的手或给你想要的东西。你会像其他人一样排队，并遵循同样的流程。
现在就习惯吧。这将使你更加容易的过渡。从获得驾驶执照到开设银行账户，再到租房/买房居住，再到获得水电或食物。你将被要求自己处理，并遵循与其他人相同的规则。
The USA has very strong rule of law. Attempted bribery of public officials is very severely frowned upon and not tolerated.
Beyond that, get to know your coworkers. Introduce yourself to neighbors. Especially on either side if you live in a house. Spend a lot of time observing how people interact with each other. Americans are very friendly for the most part and don’t usually mind chatting with new people and getting to know them. But be aware of the social contexts and what is going on around you.
如果你发现自己与政府机构（DMV、SSA、IRS、警察等）打交道，在任何情况下都不要问他们你需要给他们什么才能更快地处理你的请求！尤其是与警察一起，让他们走开或减少犯罪。许多移民来自将贿赂制度化为政府和/或执法程序一部分的国家。在这里不要尝试！曾经我再怎么强调也不为过。如果你幸运的话，你的请求会被拒绝，你的钱会被退回。而通常你会被关进监狱。
美国很重视法治。对公职人员行贿未遂的行为是非常严厉的，是不能容忍的。
除此之外，了解你的同事。向邻居介绍你自己。如果你住的地方两边都有房。花大量时间观察人们如何相互交流。大多数美国人都很友好，通常不介意与陌生人聊天并结识。但要注意社会环境和你周围发生的事情。
How not to be successful and struggle is expecting someone to find you a job, expect a job based on your background and experience back home (if you’re not entering as a skilled immigrant), expecting others to be at your beck and call, expecting handouts and money from the government (not possible for most immigrants by law) and/or expecting people to treat you like you were back in your home country.
Lastly as social customs go, it is considered rude to have conversations in group settings such as work in your native tongue with other speakers if those around are not fluent in those languages. It is also really bad form to criticize the USA with statements like “Things are better back in my country…” during a conversation. While it may be true it will be interpreted by Americans as you engaging in some kind of moral superiority over the USA and double standard by taking advantage of the USA for your own ends but not caring about the fact you’re here and should be part of the American experience.
最终要想在美国取得成功，在日常生活中你必须学会做一个美国人。美国有自己的社会准则和做事方式。其中很多讲究分权和平等。你需要自己解决这个问题。
如何不成功和挣扎就是期待有人给你找到一份工作，期待一份基于你在国内的背景和经验的工作（如果你不是以熟练技能工移民的身份加入），期待其他人听从你的指挥，期待政府的施舍和金钱（根据法律，大多数移民不可能）和/或指望别人像在自己国家一样对待你。
最后，随着社会习俗的发展，如果周围的人不能流利地使用母语，那么在小组环境中用母语与其他人交谈被认为是不礼貌的。在谈话中，用“我的国家情况更好……”这样的话来批评美国，也是一种很糟糕的形式。虽然这可能是真的，但美国人会将其解释为，你们对美国有某种道德优越感和双重标准，为了自己的目的利用美国，但不关心事实：你来到了这里，应该成为美国的一分子。
The trick to getting a US visa easily:
Don’t believe the slickies and touts that promise they can get you a visa for sure, for a fee, if you just take all these phony papers and memorize the spiel they teach you.
Make your own application because you have a reason to go there and you know what that reason is, go to the interview, tell the simple truth, don’t exaggerate, don’t lie.
I can’t guarantee that you’ll get the visa, but you will certainly sleep better .
轻松获得美国签证的诀窍：
不要相信那些花言巧语的人和吹嘘者，他们保证只要你拿着这些假文件，记住他们教你的口诀，他们就一定能给你一张签证，而且是收费的。
自己申请，因为你有理由去那里，而且你知道那是什么原因，去面试，说出简单的事实，不要夸大，不要撒谎。
我不能保证你能拿到签证，但你肯定会睡得更安稳。
What makes a successful politician in the USA?
Primarily money, as in campaign funds is the first requirement to even attempt an Election run.
Name recognition.
(President Trump broke many of the accepted requirements and unspoken rules.)
But being faithful in your personal relationships is a big one.
Being above scandal. Look all the way back till you were 12 years old.
Not being a Playboy/Partyperson.
Working your way up in the party of your choice.
Ability to work across the party boundaries when needed.
Being a great Public Speaker is a big one.
Having a good looking spouse and kids.
Being in good physical shape, and being good looking.
Living in the right State or County.
是什么造就了美国成功的政治家？
主要是资金，就像竞选资金一样，是竞选的第一要求。
姓名识别。
（特朗普总统打破了许多公认的要求和潜规则。）
但是在你的人际关系中保持忠诚是一件重要的事。
远离丑闻。一直回头看，直到你12岁。
不是花花公子。
在你选择的政党中努力向上。
有能力在需要时跨党派工作。
成为一名伟大的公众演说家是一件重要的事。
有一个漂亮的配偶和孩子。
身体状况良好，相貌英俊。
生活在正确的州或县。
What are the best/worst things about dating in your 40s?
I am in my 40's, first negative that comes to mind is 3 months ago my boyfriend whom I loved with my whole being, died. This is by far, the worst set back of dating in my forty's.
And now on dating; its not pleasant. I'm finding a lot of 'put me on the spot' type of shit. I go out, or hang out with a guy once or twice, suddenly he's either pressuring a commitment or trying to get laid. But instead of at least trying to be charming to woo, these guys in their fortys are blatantly asking.
在40多岁的时候约会最好/最坏的事情是什么？
我已经40多岁了，我想到的第一个负面消息是3个月前，我深爱着的男友去世了。到目前为止，这是我四十多岁时约会中最糟糕的一次。
现在开始约会；这很不愉快。我发现了很多“让我陷入困境”的烂人。我和一个男人出去玩一两次，突然间他要么是想要承诺要么就是想跟你上床。但是，这些40多岁的男人并没有试图用魅力来求爱，而是公然要求。“
How do I marry an American?
it looks like either nobody wants to answer your question or they think you are a boy, LOL.
ok as an American guy who married a cChinese girl I first met online, I will tell you I met a lot of very attractive Chinese girls when I was in China for work. I would have considered marriage to one of them if I'd been there in one place long enough to have a serious relationship develop. I almost did twice. My problem was that I'd be there for three weeks then go home for 2 to three months before coming back again. Often the girl I was seeing would have moved
however, a lot of the men who go for work are older, or married at home, don't speak Chinese and aren't willing to learn, doesn't seem like language is an issue for you though. A bigger problem for you will be that many who go there are faced with too much temptation at every turn. There is so much competition from so many Chinese women for each interested Western guy that the guys often just turn into playboys.
我怎样才能嫁给一个美国人？
看起来要么没有人想回答你的问题，要么他们认为你是个男孩，哈哈。
好吧，作为一个美国人，我和一个在网上认识的中国女孩结了婚，我要告诉你，我在中国工作的时候遇到了很多非常有魅力的中国女孩。如果我在一个地方呆的时间足够长，可以发展一段认真的关系，我会考虑和他们中的一个结婚。我几乎经历了两次。我的问题是，我会在那里呆三个星期，然后回家两到三个月，然后再回来。
然而，很多上班的男人年纪较大，或者在老家已经结婚，不会说中文，也不愿意学习，但语言对你们来说似乎并不是一个问题。对你来说，一个更大的问题是，许多去那里的人在每一个转折点都面临着太多的诱惑。每一个有趣的西方男人都有那么多中国女人为他竞争，以至于这些男人往往会变成花花公子。
next there are dating sites. My wife was on several. Most are old men who only hit on the most beautiful (photoshopped) girls on the site. If you DID want to try one, I'd suggest CLM... It has a blog and a good community and a "scammer jail". It's very different from the majority out there. But you'll still need to compete with a lot of women for a few men who are worth talking to and its saturated by old men.
You could try to find a way to travel here again but in a short trip, you'll probably find it easy to find dates but hard to get into a serious enough relationship to survive going home
You could try language exchange websites...
I dont one mean to dissuade you. It's hard but often Chinese girls who marry white American guys FOR THE RIGHT REASONS, ie, they really have a good relationship and love each other are very good marriages.
我想说，你的普通英语老师也不是真正的赢家。不是所有人，但很多人都没有更好的职业前景，所以去中国找乐子和做爱吧。即使你找到一个心地善良的人他可能也不会给你带来很好的生活。
接下来是约会网站。我妻子就有好几次。大多数都是上了年纪的男人，他们只喜欢网站上最漂亮的(ps过的)女孩。如果你真的想试试，我建议CLM。它有一个博客，一个很好的社区和一个“骗子监狱”。这和大多数人很不一样。但你仍然需要与很多女性竞争，才能找到几个值得一谈的男性，而且这儿已经被老男人占据了。
你可以尝试再次到这里旅行，但在一次短暂的旅行中，你可能会发现很容易找到约会对象，但很难建立一种足够认真的关系，以建立家庭。
您可以尝试语言交换网站。
我不是想劝阻你。这很难，但通常中国女孩为了正确的理由与美国白人结婚，也就是说，他们的关系真的很好，彼此相爱，这是非常好的婚姻。
我妻子发现我在一个网站上写博客，开始给我发信息，因为她喜欢我的写作方式。我们开始聊天，然后就开始了。她是主动的一方。基本上是她决定想要找我，并开始得到我，哈哈。她是一个坚强聪明的女人，她得到了她想要的。当你找到一个你感兴趣的男人时，你不应该害羞地问他是否愿意和你走下去。我知道这与中国人的做法背道而驰。但在美国，大多数时候，女性是选择的一方。但当她眼神交流并微笑时，就好像她允许我们接近她一样。她还决定是否让我们走得更远。她真的更有控制力，我们只是摆出姿势，假装.....
remember you are probably cuter and thinner than most women he talks to and you are different.. This gives you an advantage.. But also remember we don't usually marry until we have a very substantial, developed relationship. Also don't mention you are looking to marry. You'll make him run if that comes up too early.. Never mention it before he's told you he loves you... Skype sex is probably going to come long before marriage talks.. But don't get talked into that too early either.. He will think you're easy and use you even if he's not interested in any kind of long term thing.
我不知道你住在哪里，你在上大学吗，有没有地方可以遇到不只是在国外工作的西方男人？如果没有，上网与人交谈。询问他们是否愿意使用skype。你可以说你对（无论你知道他们喜欢什么）感兴趣，想谈论它，还想练习你的英语。把你的skypes过程当成约会。调情要有趣。如果他想知道你喜欢做什么，不要说购物和睡觉。哈哈，很多中国女孩都这么说，不过这真的没趣。
记住，你可能比与他交谈过的大多数女性都更可爱、更苗条，而你是与众不同的。这给了你一个优势。但也要记住，除非我们有一段非常充实、成熟的关系，否则我们通常不会结婚。也别提你想结婚。如果提得太早，你会让他逃跑的。在他告诉你他爱你之前千万别提。Skype性爱可能早在沟通婚姻之前就开始了，但是也不要过早地谈论这个问题。即使他对任何长期的事情都不感兴趣，他也会认为你很容易被利用。