你从惨痛的教训中学到了什么（ 二）
What life lesson did you learn the hard way?
译文简介
网友：还记得那个红气球是如何吸引我们周围事物的注意力的吗？那只红气球是我们当时不惜一切代价想要的唯一东西。哭着在街上滚来滚去，坚持要我父母给我买一个。因为那个红气球是我当时唯一想要的东西。但是，直到我们找到一家棉花糖店，坚持让父母给我们买一个，这种爱和感情才消失......
正文翻译
What life lesson did you learn the hard way?
你从惨痛的教训中学到了什么?
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Manu Pandey, 20岁。
That red balloon was the only thing we wanted at that moment at any cost.
Crying rolling down on the street and insisting my parents to buy me one.
Because that red balloon was the only thing I wanted at that moment.
But that love and affection were only till we found a cotton candy shop and insisted our parents to buy us one.
And there were many things that stopped mattering to us just after we saw that red balloon.
Like this, there’s always a probability of finding better.
There’s always a probability of finding a better place, person, emotion, and relationship.
But we don’t know when.
Maybe in the next minute or maybe a next year, but there’s surely a probability of finding better.
还记得那个红气球是如何吸引我们周围事物的注意力的吗？
那只红气球是我们当时不惜一切代价想要的唯一东西。
哭着在街上滚来滚去，坚持要我父母给我买一个。
因为那个红气球是我当时唯一想要的东西。
但是，直到我们找到一家棉花糖店，坚持让父母给我们买一个，这种爱和感情才消失。
在我们看到那个红色气球之后，有很多事情对我们不再重要了。
像这样，总有可能找到更好的。
总有可能找到更好的地方、更好的人、更好的情感和更好的关系。
但我们不知道什么时候。
也许在下一分钟或明年，但肯定有可能找到更好的。
This guy started a company that was worth almost $400 million.
After six months of trying to land a meeting with him, I finally got a time for coffee.
I was a 19 year old entrepreneur at the time and I had the idea to invent the first leather watch strap without holes.
The guy I was meeting with had started one of the biggest watch brands in the world.
I thought meeting with him would give me all the keys to success.
That’s what a lot of entrepreneurs don’t realize.
There is no right way to success. Everyone has their own path.
This CEO wasn’t going to be able to make me successful.
Though he could provide some great insight, I wasn’t going to become successful by listening.
I had do to something.
If I had spent the time I used trying to land this meeting on growing my business, I may have been further along the path to success.
这家伙创办了一家价值近4亿美元的公司。
经过六个月的努力，我终于有时间和他见面了。
当时我是一名19岁的企业家，我有了发明第一条无孔皮革表带的想法。
我遇到的那个人创立了世界上最大的手表品牌之一。
我以为和他见面，这能给我所有成功的钥匙。
这是很多企业家没有意识到的。
没有正确的成功之路。每个人都有自己的路。
这位首席执行官不可能让我成功。
虽然他能提供一些很好的见解，但我不会因为倾听而成功。
我不得不做点什么。
如果我曾经花时间尝试让这次会议发展我的业务，我可能已经在通往成功的道路上走得更远了。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
My watch company had done just over six figures in sales.
This CEO with the $400 million company was giving a speech at a local university.
I attended and stayed after to chat.
As I approached, he said, “you look familiar”.
Excited, I said to him, “I’m the kid who met you about his watch company. Here is it!”
HE WAS STOKED! I had made the leap from a wantrepreneur to a real business owner.
As a entrepreneur, you realize mentors are important but aren’t the ones who will actually do the work for you.
向前看一年。
我的手表公司的销售额刚刚超过六位数。
这家价值4亿美元的公司的首席执行官在当地一所大学发表演讲。
我参加了之后留下来聊天。
当我走近时，他说：“你看起来很面熟。”。
我兴奋地对他说：“我就是那个跟你谈他的手表公司的孩子，就在这儿！”
他振奋了！我从一个想要创业的人一跃而成一个真正的企业主。
作为一名企业家，你意识到导师很重要，但却不是真正为你工作的人。
Class matters not the swag.
Health is the only wealth you have.
People say “follow your heart", ignore it. Instead “listen to your heart , act with your brain”.
If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you'll never get it done. Just do it.
You won't become rich just by saving. Learn how to invest.
People will treat you according to their need and greed.
A quick temper will make a fool of you soon enough.
Take a deep breath every now and then. It calms the mind.
Be a good listener.
阶级问题并不重要。
健康是你唯一的财富。
人们说“跟随你的心”，忽略它。相反，“倾听你的心，用你的大脑行动”。
如果你花太多时间思考一件事，你永远无法完成它，想做就做。
你不会仅仅靠储蓄致富。要学习如何投资。
人们会根据自己的需要和贪婪来对待你。
暴躁的脾气很快就会使你出丑。
时不时地深呼吸。它能让人平静下来。
做一个好的倾听者。
Never leave someone good for someone better, that good will get the best one day.
Life is too short. And too unpredictable.
Being good at your job is not enough to earn you promotions and pay increases
People want you to succeed, but not more than their-selves.
People very conveniently tend to forget all the good things you did to them.
You'll be cheated, betrayed by your close ones, don't get surprised. Smile. And move on.
The best revenge is MASSIVE SUCCESS.
Be grateful for what you have.
Never waste your time. Use it effectively because time is very important.
Invest on brain; read good quality books watch useful videos. To do that search on youtube “The Mastery Guide Youtube Channel” or you can search “Improvement Source” here you will get many books summary and useful ideas on animated format.
给你所爱的人比他们期望的更多。
永远不要为了更好的人而离开一个好的人，好人总有一天会得到最好的。
生命太短暂了。而且太不可预测了。
做好你的工作不足以让你获得晋升和加薪。
人们希望你成功，但不希望超过他们自己。
人们很容易忘记你对他们所做的一切好事。
你会被你亲近的人欺骗，背叛，不要惊讶，微笑继续前进。
最好的报复就是巨大的成功。
感激你所拥有的。
永远不要浪费时间，有效地利用它，因为时间非常重要。
投资于大脑；阅读高质量的书籍，观看有用的视频。要在油管上搜索“The Mastery Guide Youtube Channel”，或者你可以在这里搜索“Improvement Source”，你会得到很多关于动画格式的书籍总结和有用的想法。
Awdhesh Singh，前美国国税局培训师，UPSC教育家，时间管理教练
I, however, decided to go ahead and face him boldly rather than running like coward.
Once, I was posted under him, I was impressed by his intelligence and his depth of knowledge of rules and laws of taxation. He was too brilliant for most people to handle. It was a challenge for me to come to his expectation by having a matching knowledge.
Just after a few weeks of my posting, a tricky issue of refund came up. There was a huge refund sanctioned by the Assistant Commissioner which needed the approval of Commissioner before it can be given to the party. The file has to pass through me. The party had given a presentation of his case and the Commissioner was satisfied about the validity of refund. He, therefore, directed me to clear his case quickly.
However, when I studied the file, I did not find it a fit case for giving refund. I was on a fix because Commissioner had already promised the party for the refund before all of us. Anyone knowing his competency and authority would have taken for granted that refund would be given. My writing adverse note would have surely angered the party and would have caused loss of face to the Commissioner. I was bound to face the consequence for defying his order.
I, however, decided to stick to my conscience despite all my fear and wrote a long note explaining the reasons why refund can’t be given. The file was sent to the Commissioner. My reasoning was so strong that he had no option but to accept my view on the matter.
几年前，我被派往德里的一个新部门。众所周知，那里的专员是非常强硬和布置艰巨任务的主人。人们以前很怕他，有些人因为他而换了职位。我自己的一个同事，也被派到同一部门，因为害怕，他动用了所有资源让人改变了他的职位。许多人也建议我这样做，以免破坏与他共事的事业。
一、 然而，我决定勇敢地面对他，而不是像懦夫一样奔跑。
有一次，我被任命为他的下属，他的智慧和他对税收规则和法律的深入了解给我留下了深刻印象。他太聪明了，大多数人都应付不了。对我来说，通过掌握相应的知识来达到他的期望是一个挑战。
就在我被任命几周后，一个棘手的退款问题出现了。助理专员批准了一笔巨额的退款，但需要得到专员的批准才能将这笔退款交给当事人。文件必须经过我的审核。当事人陈述了他的案件，专员对退款的有效性感到满意。因此，他指示我尽快结案。
然而，当我研究这份文件时，我发现它不适合退款。我陷入了困境，因为专员已经在我们所有人面前向当事人承诺退款。任何知道他的能力和权威的人都会想当然地认为会给予退款。我写的反对信肯定会激怒当事人，也会使专员丢面子。我必须面对违抗他命令的后果。
一、 然而，尽管我很害怕，我还是决定坚持我的良知，并写了一张长纸条解释为什么不能退款。档案已送交专员。我的理由很充分，他别无选择，只能接受我对这件事的看法。
退款最终没有得到批准。
I was quite apprehensive about the consequence of annoying him. Hence, I was pleasantly surprised when I came to know that he had given me “Outstanding”
performance report for that year.
Once I broached this topic to him when we were having a cup of tea and reminded him my note and his outstanding rating given to me. He said me smilingly, “How many officers in our department have the guts to overrule me on a technical topic and defy my order. Your noting on that file only increased my liking for you due to your courage of conviction and your knowledge of law. You got the performance
appraisal what you deserved.”
I remember how many sleepless nights I had before I developed the courage to write adverse noting on the file. Most of the senior officers in a similarly situation would have surely spoiled my performance report on some pretext. He not only forgave my defiance but even appreciated it.
I learned that day that he was not only ruthless but also very compassionate. I understood that good and evil and two sides of the same coin. I could appreciate the following wisdom given by Peter Drucker’s in his book “The Effective Executive”.
“The idea that there are well-rounded people, people who have only strengths and no weaknesses, is a prescxtion for mediocrity if not for incompetence… strong people always have strong weaknesses too… where there are peaks, there are valleys.”
Most people see only valleys of other people to get a false sense of superiority. However, we can rise in life only by conquering the peaks.
我很担心惹恼他的后果。因此，当我得知他在当年的业绩报告上给了我“杰出的”评价时，我感到惊喜。
有一次，我们喝茶的时候，我向他提起这个话题，提醒他我的笔记和他给我的杰出评价。他笑着对我说：“我们部门有多少办公人员有胆量在一个技术问题上否决我，违抗我的命令。你在文件上的记录只会增加我对你的喜爱，因为你的勇气和你的法律知识。你应得的。”
我记得有多少个不眠之夜，我才鼓起勇气在文件上写下不利的注释。处于类似情况的大多数高级官员肯定会以某种借口破坏我的业绩报告。他不仅原谅了我的”挑衅“，甚至还感激我。
那天我知道他不仅冷酷无情，而且很有同情心。我明白善与恶是同一硬币的两面。我可以欣赏彼得·德鲁克在《有效的高管》一书中给出的以下智慧。
“认为有全面发展的人，只有优点而没有缺点的人，如果不是无能的话，那就是平庸的药方，强者也总是有顽固的弱点……哪里有高峰，哪里就有低谷。”
大多数人只看到别人的低谷，从而产生一种虚假的优越感。然而，只有征服巅峰，我们才能在生活中崛起。
Pragya Rathore，在圣何塞州立大学学习 超大规模集成电路设计(2020年)
Friend 2: “You’re my bruh!”
Friend 3: “Pragya you’re my best friend for 10 years, I’m never going to leave you. Girlfriends will come and go, but you are forever.”
Friend 4: “I know we don’t talk often but you matter to me more than you can imagine.”
Friend 5: “You are everything to me.”
WORDS. HEAVY WORDS.
朋友1：“我们密不可分。无论发生什么，我们都会永远在一起。”
朋友2：“你是我的兄弟！”
朋友3：“布拉格，你是我十年来最好的朋友，我永远不会离开你。女朋友会来来去去去，但你永远在。”
朋友4：“我知道我们不常说话，但你对我的重要性超出了你的想象。”
朋友5：“你是我的一切。”
话语，沉重的话语。
Once someone has left you, you don’t go back. It’s a dumb thing to ask for forgiveness if it isn’t your fault. Walk out. No explanations involved.
People leave and at times I have abandoned people. Sometimes it gets toxic to keep someone in your life because of the negativity involved and you have to let them go.
I don’t make friends now, sure I do have ‘people’ to talk to but no friends. I talk to ‘people’ like friends are supposed to talk and I’m loyal to them but I maintain a layer of self protection and that’s how it should be. It’s just not worth getting emotionally attached to people.
Friendship is overrated. It is hyped.
In the end the monument stands on two pillars and those are your parents.
Friends, Girlfriends, Boyfriends will come and go but the word FOREVER should be always lixed to your parents.
讽刺的是，他们现在都不是我的朋友。在过去的5个月里，我失去了这些朋友。现在当我想起这些话时，它们只会让我发笑。我不再受语言的影响。我相信语言是最伟大的武器，你用它来对抗或支持某人，他们不会忘记，永远不会。
一旦有人离开你，你就不要回头。如果不是你的错，请求原谅是愚蠢的。走开，不用解释。
人们会离开，有时我也会抛弃人们。有时候，因为负面影响，让某人留在你的生活中是有害的，你必须让他们离开。
我现在不交朋友了，当然我有可以聊天的“人”，但没有朋友。我和“人”说话就像朋友应该说话一样，我对他们很忠诚，但我保持着一层自我保护，这就是我应该做的。只是不值得在感情上依附于人。
友谊是被高估了，这是被大肆宣传的。
最后，纪念碑矗立在两根柱子上，那是你的父母。
朋友、女朋友、男朋友会来来去去去，但“永远”这个词应该永远与你的父母联系在一起。
I have lost hundreds of times in my life. I have been pained to the bones. I have been depressed to a point where getting out of bed was considered an accomplishment. I have been treated like dirt and lied to.
And that is why I learned that failure is a success. I don’t mean it is a success in the literal terms. But failure is an opportunity to learn and grow. Pain is an opportunity to become wiser.
Now, each time I fail, I remind myself that this is an opportunity. I WILL be better after this. Lose to win!
4 LIFE LESSONS I LEARNED THE HARD WAY
我这辈子已经输过几百次了。我痛得要死。我一直很沮丧，以至于起床被认为是一种成就。我被人瞧不起，被人欺骗。
这就是为什么我知道失败就是成功。我并不是说从字面上来说这是一个成功。但失败是一个学习和成长的机会。痛苦是变聪明的机会。
现在，每次我失败，我都提醒自己这是一个机会。我会好起来的。输就是赢！
我努力之后学到的4条人生经验：
I failed to win medals in my first two International Science Olympiad. I didn’t play a single minute in the finals of my first National Basketball Championship.
I used to come home, angry at myself, sad and desperate. But, once I actually began to work, good things happened (I won 6 International Science Olympiad medals and became a member of the Youth Basketball Team.)
The key to success is hard-work. There is no secret. Plain and simple. If you work hard, good things will happen to you!
努力工作是成功的关键
在我的前两届国际科学奥林匹克竞赛中，我没能获得奖牌。在我第一次参加全国篮球锦标赛的决赛中，我一分钟也没有上场。
我常常回到家，生自己的气，难过，绝望。但是，一旦我真正开始工作，好事就发生了（我赢得了6枚国际科学奥林匹克奖牌，并成为了青年篮球队的一员）
成功的关键是努力工作，没有秘密，简单明了。如果你努力工作，好事就会发生在你身上！
When I first started to participate in Olympiads, some people said “you can’t.” When I won my first medal, some people said “it’s just one medal.” When I won my second, they said “you just got lucky.” When I won my 6th, they said “you were privileged at the beginning.”
When I first started writing in Quora, they said “there is no point in writing.” The trend continues on and on. I can probably fill this whole page with stories like these.
I used to come home, angry and sad over these comments but I soon learned that whatever I do, someone, somewhere, will hate me. Not because of who I am. Not because there is anything personal.
But humans are humans. We all see our reflections in others. It is normal that some people do not like you. And, guess what? You can’t change it.
Learn to accept it.
你不能取悦所有人
当我刚开始参加奥运会时，有些人说“你不能”。当我赢得第一枚奖牌时，有些人说“这只是一枚奖牌。”当我第二次赢的时候，他们说“你真走运。”当我获得第六名时，他们说“你一开始就很幸运。”
当我第一次开始在Quora写作时，他们说“写作没有意义”这一趋势持续不断。我可能可以用这样的故事填满整页。
我常常回到家，对这些评论感到愤怒和悲伤，但我很快就知道，无论我做什么，总会有人在某处恨我。不是因为我是谁，也不是因为有什么私事。
但人就是人。我们都能在别人身上看到自己的影子。有些人不喜欢你是正常的。你猜怎么着？你又不能改变它。
学会接受它。
I once dated a beautiful girl. My mother, for whatever reason, was totally against it. She tried to keep it to herself but she was so against that relationship that she could hardly contain herself sometimes.
And I was dumb. I went on, dated the girl, completely discarded anything my mother said.
Guess what happened at the end? I had a rough period. The girl treated me like dirt, saying anything that came to her mind without any empathy.
And who was there when I was at my lowest? My mum. She was there when I did not get the scholarship from Cambridge. She was there, taking care of me when I was sick with fever, almost raving in my bed.
She has always been. And she will always be there for me. The girls might come and go. Some will love you truly; sometimes, things won’t work out.
But, whatever happens, your mother will be there for you.
你母亲是你生命中的第一位女性
我曾经和一个漂亮女孩约会。不管出于什么原因，我母亲总是反对。她试图把这件事藏在心里，但她非常反对这种关系，有时她几乎控制不住自己。
我当时很傻，我继续和那个女孩约会，完全把我母亲说的一切抛在脑后。
猜猜最后发生了什么？我经历了一段艰难的时期。那女孩把我当粪土一样对待，她脑子里想什么就说什么，没有任何同理心。
当我处于最低谷时，谁在那里？是我妈妈。我没有从剑桥获得奖学金时，她就在那里。当时我发烧，几乎在床上胡言乱语时，她在那里照顾我。
她一直都在。她会永远在我身边。女孩们可能会来来去去。有些人会真心爱你；有时候，事情不会成功。
但是，不管发生什么，你妈妈都会在你身边。
Nobody cares if you were a better candidate: she had a prettier face.
On and on, I have faced situations where the world was unfair. I have seen people lie and cheat their way up to MIT. (Don’t ask me how. It’s a different story for a different time.) I have seen people cheat their partners and lie straight to their faces.
The world doesn’t care if you are a good lad or not. Period.
Some things will be unfair in your life. Some things will be unjust. The best you can do is learn to accept this and strive.
To finish this article, I want to leave this quote:
“What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger.”
Use your pain to motivate yourself! Use your losses to learn, to become wiser! Once you embrace failure, you will be unstoppable!
Failure is a success when you take it, inspect it and throw it!
Don’t let it crash you! Accept it! Move on!!
世界是不公平的
没人在乎你是不是更好的候选人：她有一张更漂亮的脸。
我一次又一次遇到了世界不公平的情况。我见过有人在麻省理工学院撒谎作弊。（别问我怎么做。这是一个不同时代的不同故事。）我见过有人欺骗伴侣，而且当面撒谎。
世界不在乎你是不是一个好孩子，就是这样。
生活中有些事情是不公平的。有些事情是不公正的。你所能做的就是学会接受这一点并努力奋斗。
为了完成这篇文章，我想留下这句话：
“杀不死你的，只会让你更强大。”
用你的痛苦来激励自己！化失败为动力去去学习，变得更聪明！一旦你拥抱失败，你将势不可挡！
失败就是成功—你接受它，审视它，然后扔掉它！
别让它毁了你！接受它！继续前进！
If it is easy, it is not over.
I remember how I used to make fun of people who used to talk about heartbreak and mental trauma they go through during the heartbreak. When I got dumped, I felt like I was lost, and for a brief period, I lost my will to live. And sad as it sounds six months down, I'm still traumatised. It is hard to believe how much pain someone's existence and absence can cause. I have my fair share of trust issues, meltdowns and dark approach toward affection now.
It took me three trips, endless nights crying, drowning myself in work and multiple meeting with therapists and family to make things okay for me. I'm not mad at the guy, he left for good, for both of us. If he was a manipulative piece of shit who barely knew how to perform on the bed, I was no sane either; I caused a fair share of drama in his life after leaving.
如果这很容易，那它还没有结束。
我记得我以前是如何取笑那些经常谈论心碎和他们在心碎时所经历的精神创伤的人的。当我被甩的时候，我感觉自己迷失了方向，在很短的一段时间里，我失去了生存的意志。虽然已经过去六个月了，但我仍然很伤心。很难相信一个人的存在和缺席会造成多大的痛苦。我现在也面临很多信任问题、面临崩溃和现在的爱情是黑暗的。
我经历了三次旅行，没完没了地哭个不停，埋头于工作，多次与治疗师和家人会面，才让一切顺利。我没生那家伙的气，他永远离开了，为了我们俩。 如果他是个控制欲强的混蛋在床上几乎不会表演，我也神志不清;我离开后给他的生活带来了不少麻烦。
No more early morning kisses or late night cuddles, A hand as pillow or smile once I'm home
You killed every emotion I had inside, just like our relationship as this year will close every memory of yours will die.
Break Ups leave us disturbed, and at times, it is hard to get over and start all over again, if you ever need any help, please reach out to me. I will try my best to do something. I had no one and wished no one ever goes through what I went through. I learnt the subtle art of moving on the hard way; I hope I can ease the pain for you.
但我花了很长时间才原谅自己和这样一个男人在一起，做出牺牲后选了一份完全不同的职业，走到了今天的位置。（并不是说我对现在不满意，只是感觉不对）重点是，这永远不会是一件容易的事，继续前进，并意识到你想为之奉献一生的人对你的感觉已经不一样了。这就像重新书写人生最重要的篇章，很难原谅自己如此愚蠢。
不再有清晨的亲吻或深夜的拥抱，不再有一只手当枕头，不再有微笑。
你扼杀了我内心的所有情感，就像我们的关系一样，随着今年结束，你的每一段记忆都会消逝。
分手让我们心烦意乱，有时很难重新开始，如果你需要任何帮助，请联系我。我会尽力做点什么。我没有亲人，我希望没有人能经历我所经历的一切。我学会了艰难前行的微妙艺术；我希望我能为你减轻痛苦。