菲律宾为什么有那么多的单身妈妈?
Why are there so many single moms in the Philippines?
译文简介
网友:致所有读到这篇文章的女士,以下是一些成为单亲妈妈的捷径。步骤1:和一个不成熟、不负责任、爱控制别人的男人谈恋爱。男方年龄大小无所谓。最好的例子就是那些喜欢乱花钱,并且自以为是的男人。老实地说,你自己可能也不成熟和不负责任......
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菲律宾为什么有那么多的单身妈妈?
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To any ladies reading this, here's a sure way to become a single mother.
Step 1. Get into a relationship with an immature, irresponsible, and manipulative man. Doesn't matter what his age is. Good examples are men who have no financial discipline and men who think they're always right (and blame exes for break ups).
(To be fair, you yourself can be the one immature and irresponsible.)
Step 2. Engage in unprotected sex. He'll talk you into it, better not resist.
致所有读到这篇文章的女士,以下是一些成为单亲妈妈的捷径。
步骤1:和一个不成熟、不负责任、爱控制别人的男人谈恋爱。男方年龄大小无所谓。最好的例子就是那些喜欢乱花钱,并且自以为是的男人。老实地说,你自己可能也不成熟和不负责任
步骤2:进行无保护的性行为。他会说服你的,你最好别抗拒。
Step 4. Because of stress, you might develop psychological problems.
Step 5. When everything is too much and your self-respect and logic have come running back, you may break up with the boyfriend.
Congratulations, you are now a single mom!
Before anyone starts hating on my answer, this is my humorous approach to my experience on why I became a single mom.
步骤3:因为堕胎在菲律宾是非法的,所以你一定会把孩子生下来。生下孩子后,和男方维持住关系,但这段关系接下来就会恶化(由于步骤1)
步骤4:由于压力,你可能会出现心理问题
步骤5:当难以忍受以后,你的自尊和脑子又回来了,这时你可能会和你的男朋友分手
恭喜你,成功变成了一个单亲妈妈
在有人开始攻击我之前,我想说的是,我自己就是这样成为单亲妈妈的,这是我的亲身经历
There are a lot of never married mothers in New York City also. Very sad. I thought that sex education was being taught in our schools now. But I guess not. When you think about it it's so easy for a girl to use protection. It's really stupid not to use it. Your life changes forever when you have a child out of wedlock.
纽约也有很多的单身母亲。真是可悲。我原本以为现在我们学校已经在教性教育了。但我想我猜错了。对一个女孩来说,采取保护措施是很容易的事情。不进行保护真是太蠢了。在你未婚生子后你的人生就彻底被改变了。
Raging hormones, emotional immaturity… they overrule sex ed.
狂躁的荷尔蒙,不成熟的情绪,这些都使性教育没有了作用
Whoever asked this question does not know this social issue is common in everywhere including developed countries. In developed countries, this is a social issue particularly for the unemployed and the poor. But that is no different for the Philippines. There are a variety of factors that cause this but there is no one solution to address all of them. Maybe the only way is to provide good family counselling to both Mother and Father to prepare for what happens next.
问这个问题的人不知道这是一个存在于世界各国的社会问题,包括发达国家也有。在发达国家,这是一个社会问题,尤其在失业者和穷人中非常普遍。但菲律宾也不例外。造成这种情况的因素有很多,但没有哪种解决方案可以解决所有问题。也许唯一的办法就是为父母提供良好的家庭辅导,为接下来发生的事情做好准备。
Or having a close relationship with one’s parents (who are hopefully wise as well) so that they can advise you on the best thing to do. I did. My parents accepted me and my situation and welcomed their granddaughter with open arms. They didn’t push me to get married immediately, probably so I could see how things will go with then ex-bf. It went sour, obviously.
或者和父母保持亲密的关系,这样他们就能给你最好的建议。我就是这样做的。我的父母接受了我的处境,张开双臂欢迎他们的孙女。他们没有逼我马上结婚,可能是为了让我看看和前男友的关系会如何发展。很明显,事情变糟了。
Using protective sex methods should reduce the number of single mothers in every country of the World.
使用保护性行为可以减少世界各国单身妈妈的数量
It happens there & in the USA under similar circumstances. My wife has illegitimate children and has been a single mom before we married.
I love her and the children.
在菲律宾和美国都有类似的情况。我妻子也有私生子,在我们结婚之前,她还是一个单亲妈妈,我爱她和孩子
you’re absolutely correct because i’m a single mom.i married the wrong man who is irresponsible.i raise my child alone ,i worked but with the help of my parents my child grew up as a nice lady and very kind.and thankful to GOD that HE gave me a wonderful child,no regret at all.now i am happy
你说的一点也没错,因为我也是一个单亲妈妈,我嫁给了一个不负责任的男人,既要工作又要独自照顾孩子,在我父母的帮助下,我的孩子长成了一个漂亮的姑娘。感谢上帝,他给了我一个好孩子,我一点也不后悔。现在我很幸福
That’s heartwarming to hear! I’m glad your story ended well.
听起来很感人!我很高兴你的故事有个好结局。
I worked for 15 years in a the city of Benton Harbor Michigan who’s claim to fame is 86% single parent households, as high as 60% drop out rate in high school and an average income 1/4 that of the nearby city of St Joseph.
我在密歇根州本顿港市工作了15年,那里以单亲家庭多而出名,占比86%,高中辍学率高达60%,平均收入只有附近圣约瑟夫市的1/4。
这座城市拥有普通菲律宾人永远无法拥有的机会和优势。该市约80%的高中毕业生可以完成四年的大学学业,一些人每周可以拿100美元的生活费。遗憾的是,当地利用这个条件的学生非常少。
I’m American and I can’t agree with you more. I was in Cebu last year, my first time in the Philippines. I stayed in 6 hotels in 59 days during my vacation. At two of the hotels, two young pregnant workers approached me. They said the father of the child has disappeared and has not been seen since. They asked me if I would marry them and help take care of the child. Of course I immediately said no. One day I returned back to my room to see one of the women sitting in a plastic chair in front of my room. She was crying. I didn’t fall for it.
我是美国人,非常同意你的观点。去年我在菲律宾的宿务岛,这是我第一次到菲律宾。在假期的59天里面我一共住了六个酒店。在其中两个酒店,有两个怀孕的年轻工作人员接近我。她们说孩子父亲不见了,并问我愿不愿意娶她们,一起照顾孩子。当然,我马上表示拒绝。一天,当我回到酒店房间时看到一个女人坐在我房间门口一直哭泣。我没有上当。
Yikes! I’m glad you didn’t fall for it. There are many scams targeting foreigners and that could’ve been one. For these kind of people, foreigners equals money money money.
我很高兴你没有上当。这里有很多针对外国人的骗局,这可能就是其中之一。对这些人来说,外国人就等于钱
Step 3 is really sad and it’s a huge problem in this country. Sigh.
步骤三可悲,这是菲律宾的一个大问题
Legal abortion is never gonna happen. Divorce bill won’t even become law.
在菲律宾永远别想合法堕胎了。菲律宾甚至连离婚的法律都没有
Could be the other way around. Ive heard alot of negative things about filipina women from both their own filipino men and western men
情况或许刚好相反。我从菲律宾男人和西方男人那里听到很多有关菲律宾女人的负面新闻
原创翻译:龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Reverse psychology…. nobody wants to be a single mom… they are just carried out with their feelings…
逆反心理,没有人想成为一个单亲妈妈,他们只是按照自己的感觉行事
原创翻译:龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
They are typically low income with no goals caught in a circle of poverty with plenty of time on their hands and nothing else to do
这些人通常收入低,没有目标,被困在贫困的圈子里,手上有大量的时间,没有其他事情可做
That, too. Got poor relatives. Cousin is school dropout, works in construction, wife also dropout and stays at home. And now they’re expecting child number 4. Number 3 recently died. I sometimes wonder if they think, at all.
说的没错。我有一个家里比较穷的亲戚,是我的表哥,他从学校辍学,然后到工地打工,他的老婆同样辍学呆在家里。现在他们考虑要生第四个孩子了。第三个最近夭折了。我有时候在想他们到底有没有仔细考虑过
Any country with such a deeply entrenched Catholicism (a religion adopted from a conquering power) is never going to develop. It's basically a baby factory. There's a brief documentary in the Internet about the Phillipines called “The baby factory.” Many of these women are girls 14, 15 years old. Give me a break. In the states, this is called statutory rape. Even though the United States has the highest number of teenage pregnancies of all the developed nations (even with all the birth control technologies). In the states, it's not anglos with such a high birth rate. It's hispanics. Again back to this backward form of Catholicism which does not feed the needy nor knows the meaning of the word misery.
任何国家,只要有根深蒂固的天主教传统,那就发展不起来。菲律宾基本上被叫做婴儿工厂,互联网上有一个关于菲律宾的简短纪录片,纪录片的名字就叫婴儿工厂。许多怀孕的女人只有十四五岁。饶了我吧,在美国,这就是法定强奸罪。尽管在所有发达国家中,美国的少女怀孕率是最高的(即使使用了所有的避孕技术)。但美国的高出生率不是盎格鲁人造成的,而是由拉美裔美国人造成的。这种落后的天主教传统既无法养活穷人,也不明白苦难一词的含义。
Maybe Filipinas at around age 20 have a powerful desire to have a baby, and know that if they become a single mom, that their family will help them.
或许20岁左右的菲律宾人很想要孩子,她们知道就算成为了单亲妈妈,家里人也会帮她。
I don’t hate your answer. On the contrary, I agree with you at all points. As a Filipino i would like to add that a large number of Filipino men are an immature and irresponsible lot everything is about themselves without any regards for others. They are not interested in putting up a serious effort to move upwards.
Filipino women are wonderful and hardworking. I have seen so many filipinas working as maids overseas sending their hard earn money to families while their never do well husbands just take the money and party. Filipino men need to face the reality that they need to grow and take responsibility for their actions.
我非常赞同你说的观点。作为菲律宾人,我想补充一点就是,很多菲律宾男人都很不成熟,不负责任,一切都只想着自己,而不考虑别人。他们对努力进取不感兴趣。菲律宾女人非常棒,非常勤劳,我看到很多菲律宾人在海外做女佣,把辛苦赚来的钱寄给家人,而她们那些什么也不做的丈夫就拿着这些钱去花天酒地。菲律宾男人需要面对现实,需要成长起来,为自己的行为承担起责任。
People should just grow up. Both boys and girls, men and women.
人们应该成熟一点,不管是男孩女孩,还是男人还是女人。
Why are there so many single moms in the Philippines?
What I have observed is that the top reasons stem from these 3 things:
unprotected premarital sex
no legal way to get a divorce
human labor is #1 national export
为什么菲律宾有这么多单身妈妈?
据我观察,最主要的原因来自以下3个方面:
不受保护的婚前性行为
没有合法的离婚方式
劳动力是国家最重要的出口产品
The Philippines does suffer significantly from one other national cause: divorce is not legal in the Philippines. While marriage creates a higher likelihood of a traditional (mother & father) family relationship, it can completely prevent such positive household conditions when one spouse leaves permanently.
与很多低收入国家类似的是,菲律宾许多地区未婚生子的比例很高。虽然婚姻不等同于承诺,但它能提前测试承诺。没有结婚的父母的分居率明显高于结婚的父母。
菲律宾确实受到了另一个国家的影响:在菲律宾离婚时非法的。虽然婚姻有利于传统家庭关系,但当夫妻一方永久离开后,这种积极的家庭关系就彻底不存在了。
菲律宾人经常开玩笑说,他们国家最大的出口产品就是菲律宾人,对于那些配偶在邮轮上工作永远不回来的人来说,这可不是什么玩笑。往往她们会送一些钱回去给配偶照顾家庭,但随着时间的流逝,两人之间的联系会慢慢变淡,在海外工作的配偶可以继续他们自己的生活,但是国内的那个合法配偶却无法和其他人结婚,也没有更多的收入去照顾他们的孩子。
当我第一次去菲律宾时,听到基督教会推动修改法律允许离婚时,我感到很惊讶。在进一步的研究中,我发现菲律宾单亲家庭比例之所以和世界其他国家有那么大的差距无法离婚是最主要的一个原因。不能离婚,被遗弃的配偶要么独自一人生活,要么和另一个伴侣保持非婚关系。
原创翻译:龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Do not engage in premarital sex without contraception (monogamy is the surest way)
Make strong commitments before marriage
Fight to keep your marriage together. Separation is a life-sentence in the Philippines
Don’t work overseas without previously arranging a way to be back with your family several times a year.
Don’t go into debt. Debt seems to be the catalyst for causing people to make drastic job choices like working year-round abroad
为了避免当亲生活
不要在没有避孕措施的情况下进行婚前性行为
在结婚前作出坚定的承诺
努力维持婚姻关系,在菲律宾分居要被判无期徒刑。
在没有事先安排好每年回家几次之前不要到海外工作。
不要负债。债务就是人们过度工作的催化剂,比如全年海外工作。
I know a Canadian man in the Philippines and his girlfriend is Filipina. They have been dating and been together for three years…she is pregnant with his child now but he told me that he told her that he would not marry her because there is no legal divorce in the Philippines. His Filipina girlfriend was very upset with him for stating his reason because it is such a negative reason, but the reality is people do separate when things go wrong. So now they have agreed to remain unwed and to raise the child together regardless of not being married. Personally, unless one is religious, I see no problem with their approach.
我在菲律宾认识一个加拿大人,他的女朋友是菲律宾人。他们一直在交往,在一起有三年了,现在这个女孩怀了他的孩子,但是他和我说他不会娶她,因为在菲律宾不能离婚。他的菲律宾女友对他的这个理由很生气,但在现实中,如果出现问题,那么男女双方就会分开。所以现在他们同意不结婚,不管将来结不结婚,都会一起抚养孩子。就我个人而言,除非是虔诚的教徒,否则我认为他们的做法没有问题。
ABORTION is illegal and immoral
堕胎是非法和不道德的
原创翻译:龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
With no divorce law why bother getting maried and risk bad breakups. Better to have the kids and live together without getting married.
既然没有离婚法,为什么还要冒着分手的危险结婚呢。最好是生了孩子,不结婚就住在一起。
Marriage expenses is not too much
婚姻的代价也太高了
There's no culture for get married like other asian countries
菲律宾没有其他亚洲国家那样的结婚文化